Well, it's been quite the holiday. I finished work on the 14th of december, leaving me with a full 2 weeks (paid, no less) to enjoy my holidays.
I spent a week in Vancouver and had grand plans of all sorts of important things I was going to get done. But I got sick halfway through the week, and spent 3 days in bed. So I actually got very little done.
Then I left for Alberta on the 21st, where I met with my sister. Together we made the drive to Cold Lake. We took a bit of an unintentinal detour which extended the drive by an extra hour or so, but we got to see some interesting Alberta scenery that we hadn't seen before. We saw Venice AB, a very large lookout tower, and at some point we even crossed the continental divide.
Christmas in Cold Lake was pretty run-of-the-mill. I visited with family and friends, and hid in the basement to avoid the cold outside. On Christmas Even I watched Die Hard, the best christmas movie of them all.
It didn't snow while I was there, so I didn't have to shovel the walk, and for that I'm thankful. And of course like every year I was caught up on who's getting married, who's engaged, and who's having babies. That's usually the part I dislike
most about going home lately.
On the 27th it was off to Edmonton. We had a delicious dinner for my Aunt and Uncle's 25th anniversary. We spent a day in Camrose visiting my Grandmother. And then I spent the next 3 to 4 days visiting with as many friends as I could. Sadly, most of the visits were only for 3 hours at a time, which didn't provide enough time to properly catch up with everybody. But I guess I'm at the age where life gets busy and it gets harder and harder to keep in touch with people. It was still nice to see everybody I did have a chance to visit with though. Edmonton doesn't feel like a second home to me anymore, but I still miss my friends quite a lot.
But I don't miss the freezing weather. I can't wait to get back to the Vancouver gloom. Because at least the temperature in Vancouver is reasonable.
I also can't wait to sleep in my own bed again. All in all, it's been a good holiday. Now I just need a holiday to help me recover from the holiday.
12.18.2007
Let's Pretend This Never Happened
Today is December 18th. According to my calendar, it's my birthday. As of today I am 27 years of age.
Can I pretend that this day didn't happen? Heck, can I go back a few years to when I was 23? 'Cuz that'd be awesome.
I mean, I guess I'm still "young" technically. But 27 is only 3 years away from 30. This past year has felt like a short one, and so I expect that 30 will arrive sooner than I expect.
Then again, that's like 1000 days away, give or take.
Maybe I'll start keeping a prison-tally on my wall. One chalk mark for every day closer to 30.
Ah well. I suppose you can't stop progress.
Can I pretend that this day didn't happen? Heck, can I go back a few years to when I was 23? 'Cuz that'd be awesome.
I mean, I guess I'm still "young" technically. But 27 is only 3 years away from 30. This past year has felt like a short one, and so I expect that 30 will arrive sooner than I expect.
Then again, that's like 1000 days away, give or take.
Maybe I'll start keeping a prison-tally on my wall. One chalk mark for every day closer to 30.
Ah well. I suppose you can't stop progress.
11.18.2007
The Internet Breeds Misinformation - A Rant
I've been seeing an ad every time I log in to face book that makes me want to laugh because it's so absurd. There's a banner that shows up on the left of the screen fairly often that claims you can "get paid to game".
That's not the absurd part. I'm a QA tester. I already know I can get paid to play games, because that's how I currently make a living. So I had to wonder what this ad could possibly be getting at. What new information did it have to offer that I didn't already know? So I clicked the ad, and it took me here:
http://www.gamertestingground.com/
As soon as I saw this I knew it looked like a scam. But I was still curious about what it was advertising, so I skimmed through the page to see what it was all about. What a load of crap! This site is nothing but a page full of misinformation and outright lies. It's designed to pray on gullible people who are easily taken advantage of. Let me punch some holes in it for you.
First, nobody in their right mind is going to pay you $120 to play a video game. Trust me. I test games professionally and I'm nearly at the peak of my pay scale. It's nowhere near $120/hour. To put things in perspective, $120/hour would work out to around $230,400 annually if you did this full time. A QA tester will never make that kind of money. Hell, a Programmer likely won't even make that kind of money. In games, testing is the bottom of the totem pole. I've worked as a tester at the biggest game company in the world, and I still didn't make anything close to what this site claims you can earn. Take that $120/hour and remove a zero. Then you're closer to the mark.
Second, I highly doubt game companies are just going to send you copies of games before they're released so you can test them out and tell them what you think. Anybody ever heard of an NDA? If not, read back to older posts. I've ranted about them once before. The point is that the industry is so afraid of bad press and losing money that it doesn't take things like early software releases and perceived security leaks lightly. Besides that, most companies already employ a team of QA testers like me to do exactly that. If they need extra eyes from the public, they might use a public focus group, but even that's rare. If it's a larger game like an MMO that needs mass testing, it goes into a public beta. "Public" equals "unpaid".
Third, the site claims you can test games with no formal education. This may just be my own personal opinion, but I call bullshit! It's true that you can be a QA tester with no experience. But it's not likely to happen, and these days, most companies looking for QA testers are looking for candidates with previous relevant experience in the games industry, just like any other skilled job. Game testing is very technical and requires good analytical and communications skills. "I play World of Warcraft 28 hours a day" doesn't count as skills or experience. "Testing" games and "playing" games aren't actually the same thing, contrary to popular belief. The site is correct in saying that games is a $50 billion dollar business, But do you really think these companies are going to trust the integrity of their multi-billion-dollar investments to a bunch of average schmoes who bought a book from some guy's website?
I get a kick out of question 3 in the FAQ near the bottom of the page. It's got a bunch of pictures from some recently released games (and Age of Conan, which is still unreleased as of yet) with the phrase "...all these games have been tested before relase" (and note the spelling error I just copied/pasted from the page). It's true they have been tested. Every piece of software you've ever purchased has been tested before release. That should be a no-brainer. But nowhere on the page does it state that the author tested these specific titles. You know where those games were tested? By an internal QA team that worked for either the developer or the publisher, or maybe a hired gun who contracts out QA services for a fee.
I've already ripped apart question 4, so I won't get into it.
Question 5 is also full of misinformation. Guess what folks? Aside from public betas, pre-release software titles are NOT tested on retail hardware. Chances are pre-release software won't even work on your home console. Game development studios typically use very expensive developer versions of the console hardware. So unless you own a stack of stolen dev-kits that you bought from a greasy guy out of the back of a nondescript white van, it's not very likely you're going to be able to test any of this software from home. And if you're working at the game company, you're not going to pick the console you work with. You'll test what you're told to, on the whatever consoles the game is being developed for.
Please do not fall for this. Please do not buy this book. There are no magic secrets to be learned about getting a job game testing beyond what you should already know about job searching. And there's definitely no fortune to be made playing games.
Now here's the real information on how to get paid to test video games. I offer it to you for free.
1.) Get an education. Learn excellent written and verbal communication skills. Learn problem-solving skills. Learn to think logically and analytically.
2.) Go to a game or digital arts school. Work on a mod. Make your own game. Learn a little bit about the development pipeline and how a game is put together.
3.) You want to know where to find testing jobs? Apply to the game development studios as a QA tester. Send a resume and a cover letter. Go to some job interviews. It's just like finding any other job.
4.) If you want a $120/hour paycheque, become a doctor or a lawyer or a drug dealer. You won't find that kind of money in games.
That's not the absurd part. I'm a QA tester. I already know I can get paid to play games, because that's how I currently make a living. So I had to wonder what this ad could possibly be getting at. What new information did it have to offer that I didn't already know? So I clicked the ad, and it took me here:
http://www.gamertestingground.com/
As soon as I saw this I knew it looked like a scam. But I was still curious about what it was advertising, so I skimmed through the page to see what it was all about. What a load of crap! This site is nothing but a page full of misinformation and outright lies. It's designed to pray on gullible people who are easily taken advantage of. Let me punch some holes in it for you.
First, nobody in their right mind is going to pay you $120 to play a video game. Trust me. I test games professionally and I'm nearly at the peak of my pay scale. It's nowhere near $120/hour. To put things in perspective, $120/hour would work out to around $230,400 annually if you did this full time. A QA tester will never make that kind of money. Hell, a Programmer likely won't even make that kind of money. In games, testing is the bottom of the totem pole. I've worked as a tester at the biggest game company in the world, and I still didn't make anything close to what this site claims you can earn. Take that $120/hour and remove a zero. Then you're closer to the mark.
Second, I highly doubt game companies are just going to send you copies of games before they're released so you can test them out and tell them what you think. Anybody ever heard of an NDA? If not, read back to older posts. I've ranted about them once before. The point is that the industry is so afraid of bad press and losing money that it doesn't take things like early software releases and perceived security leaks lightly. Besides that, most companies already employ a team of QA testers like me to do exactly that. If they need extra eyes from the public, they might use a public focus group, but even that's rare. If it's a larger game like an MMO that needs mass testing, it goes into a public beta. "Public" equals "unpaid".
Third, the site claims you can test games with no formal education. This may just be my own personal opinion, but I call bullshit! It's true that you can be a QA tester with no experience. But it's not likely to happen, and these days, most companies looking for QA testers are looking for candidates with previous relevant experience in the games industry, just like any other skilled job. Game testing is very technical and requires good analytical and communications skills. "I play World of Warcraft 28 hours a day" doesn't count as skills or experience. "Testing" games and "playing" games aren't actually the same thing, contrary to popular belief. The site is correct in saying that games is a $50 billion dollar business, But do you really think these companies are going to trust the integrity of their multi-billion-dollar investments to a bunch of average schmoes who bought a book from some guy's website?
I get a kick out of question 3 in the FAQ near the bottom of the page. It's got a bunch of pictures from some recently released games (and Age of Conan, which is still unreleased as of yet) with the phrase "...all these games have been tested before relase" (and note the spelling error I just copied/pasted from the page). It's true they have been tested. Every piece of software you've ever purchased has been tested before release. That should be a no-brainer. But nowhere on the page does it state that the author tested these specific titles. You know where those games were tested? By an internal QA team that worked for either the developer or the publisher, or maybe a hired gun who contracts out QA services for a fee.
I've already ripped apart question 4, so I won't get into it.
Question 5 is also full of misinformation. Guess what folks? Aside from public betas, pre-release software titles are NOT tested on retail hardware. Chances are pre-release software won't even work on your home console. Game development studios typically use very expensive developer versions of the console hardware. So unless you own a stack of stolen dev-kits that you bought from a greasy guy out of the back of a nondescript white van, it's not very likely you're going to be able to test any of this software from home. And if you're working at the game company, you're not going to pick the console you work with. You'll test what you're told to, on the whatever consoles the game is being developed for.
Please do not fall for this. Please do not buy this book. There are no magic secrets to be learned about getting a job game testing beyond what you should already know about job searching. And there's definitely no fortune to be made playing games.
Now here's the real information on how to get paid to test video games. I offer it to you for free.
1.) Get an education. Learn excellent written and verbal communication skills. Learn problem-solving skills. Learn to think logically and analytically.
2.) Go to a game or digital arts school. Work on a mod. Make your own game. Learn a little bit about the development pipeline and how a game is put together.
3.) You want to know where to find testing jobs? Apply to the game development studios as a QA tester. Send a resume and a cover letter. Go to some job interviews. It's just like finding any other job.
4.) If you want a $120/hour paycheque, become a doctor or a lawyer or a drug dealer. You won't find that kind of money in games.
11.12.2007
A Shoulder to Lean On
I guess it's time to post something new on here, if for no other reason than to bump the picture of me in drag further down the page. (Related sidenote: no Dad, I don't always wear women's clothing, and I'm not planning on starting anytime soon.)
So if any of you have talked to me in the last 3 days you may have already heard this story. But I have nothing else interesting to post at the moment, so I'm going to tell the story again for the benefit of my out-of-town readers. (I know you're all lurking out there!)
I went out to Pub 340 with some friends on Friday night for lack of more entertaining things to do. Note to self: next time take earplugs. I didn't have more than a drink or two, and I didn't really care for the bands, and the evening was mostly uneventful.
Okay, that's a lie, but I'm going to glaze over the events as most of them didn't involve me in any direct manner and so don't need to be written about.
In any case, I found myself standing outside the bar at 3AM waiting for my friends to return from the alley next to the bar so we could be on our way. I don't know what they were doing in the alley, and I don't think they know what they were doing down there either. I think they just decided to take a leisurely stroll for a few feet with no particular destination in mind, and that's just where they ended up.
Back to the point. So I'm standing outside the bar on the sidewalk at the end of this alley. My back is turned to the doors as I'm mostly preoccupied with trying to figure out what my friends are doing down the alley. I'm standing with hands in pockets and shoulders hunched up to fight off the cold. I hear some people exit the bar. A few moments later I feel a pair of arms wrap around my waist from behind and a chin come to rest on my shoulder. I look over my right shoulder to greet a very inebriated female face. It's a girl/woman/carbon-based lifeform that I'd seen in the bar earlier. Not somebody I know, mind you, just somebody who I'd noticed was in the same establishment and seemed to be enjoying themselves. Too much, perhaps.
She's mumbling incoherently into my ear. I guess drinking too much will do that. I have no idea what she's saying. I can't make out a word. About a minute goes by. I endure her clinging, but I'm still more interested in what my friends in the alley are up to, and now I'm even more anxious for them to come back. Finally, I turn to the thing attached to me and state very honestly "I'm sorry, but I haven't understood a word you've said."
"Nothing?" she asks?
"Not a word." I reply.
What follows is just more incoherent mumbling that trails off into little more than a whisper. I can only make out a few words. I think perhaps she was trying to tell me I was fortunate to have her for armour from the rain. But I only caught about every third word, so mostly I'm speculating. And it wasn't raining.
She continues to cling. I continue to stand with my hands in my pockets indifferently. Finally she manages to get out a sentence that along the lines of "Are you waiting for your friends, or taking a cab home?".
Did I mention she's drunk? I'm pretty sure this is basically her completely transparent drunken way of asking if she can come home with me. I tell her I'm waiting for friends and that we're getting a cab back to their place, as soon as they return from the alley.
The mostly one-sided conversation she's been having abruptly ends. Her chin lifts from my shoulder, her arms unclasp from my waist, and she wanders away to ask the nearest stranger for a cigarette. My friends emerge from the alleyway a few moments later, and we hail a cab and go on our merry way.
So on the one hand I'm a little flattered that some strange woman would deem me friendly looking and approachable enough to latch on to. I suppose that's to my credit. But on the other hand, Eww! Gross!
So if any of you have talked to me in the last 3 days you may have already heard this story. But I have nothing else interesting to post at the moment, so I'm going to tell the story again for the benefit of my out-of-town readers. (I know you're all lurking out there!)
I went out to Pub 340 with some friends on Friday night for lack of more entertaining things to do. Note to self: next time take earplugs. I didn't have more than a drink or two, and I didn't really care for the bands, and the evening was mostly uneventful.
Okay, that's a lie, but I'm going to glaze over the events as most of them didn't involve me in any direct manner and so don't need to be written about.
In any case, I found myself standing outside the bar at 3AM waiting for my friends to return from the alley next to the bar so we could be on our way. I don't know what they were doing in the alley, and I don't think they know what they were doing down there either. I think they just decided to take a leisurely stroll for a few feet with no particular destination in mind, and that's just where they ended up.
Back to the point. So I'm standing outside the bar on the sidewalk at the end of this alley. My back is turned to the doors as I'm mostly preoccupied with trying to figure out what my friends are doing down the alley. I'm standing with hands in pockets and shoulders hunched up to fight off the cold. I hear some people exit the bar. A few moments later I feel a pair of arms wrap around my waist from behind and a chin come to rest on my shoulder. I look over my right shoulder to greet a very inebriated female face. It's a girl/woman/carbon-based lifeform that I'd seen in the bar earlier. Not somebody I know, mind you, just somebody who I'd noticed was in the same establishment and seemed to be enjoying themselves. Too much, perhaps.
She's mumbling incoherently into my ear. I guess drinking too much will do that. I have no idea what she's saying. I can't make out a word. About a minute goes by. I endure her clinging, but I'm still more interested in what my friends in the alley are up to, and now I'm even more anxious for them to come back. Finally, I turn to the thing attached to me and state very honestly "I'm sorry, but I haven't understood a word you've said."
"Nothing?" she asks?
"Not a word." I reply.
What follows is just more incoherent mumbling that trails off into little more than a whisper. I can only make out a few words. I think perhaps she was trying to tell me I was fortunate to have her for armour from the rain. But I only caught about every third word, so mostly I'm speculating. And it wasn't raining.
She continues to cling. I continue to stand with my hands in my pockets indifferently. Finally she manages to get out a sentence that along the lines of "Are you waiting for your friends, or taking a cab home?".
Did I mention she's drunk? I'm pretty sure this is basically her completely transparent drunken way of asking if she can come home with me. I tell her I'm waiting for friends and that we're getting a cab back to their place, as soon as they return from the alley.
The mostly one-sided conversation she's been having abruptly ends. Her chin lifts from my shoulder, her arms unclasp from my waist, and she wanders away to ask the nearest stranger for a cigarette. My friends emerge from the alleyway a few moments later, and we hail a cab and go on our merry way.
So on the one hand I'm a little flattered that some strange woman would deem me friendly looking and approachable enough to latch on to. I suppose that's to my credit. But on the other hand, Eww! Gross!
10.24.2007
Weekend Shenanigans!
Because I promised you photos...
The skirt was nice and breezy, and the fishnets were surprisingly warm and comfy.
But ladies, after spending roughly 4 to 6 hours in a bra, I do not envy you.
(I stole these pics from Shauna's facebook, but I'm sure she won't mind. Besides, I retain copyright of my own image. It's the law!)
The skirt was nice and breezy, and the fishnets were surprisingly warm and comfy.
But ladies, after spending roughly 4 to 6 hours in a bra, I do not envy you.
(I stole these pics from Shauna's facebook, but I'm sure she won't mind. Besides, I retain copyright of my own image. It's the law!)
10.17.2007
Temporary Metamorphosis
I can't believe what a harrowing experience shopping for women's clothing can be! I guess if I did it on a regular basis it wouldn't be such a big deal. But I mean, is it too much to as for a simple "small, medium, large" sizing system? Or how about a straight-forward waist size measurement in inches, instead of an arbitrarily chosen numbering system that varies from company to company and has relation to any standard unit of measurement. And what's with the need to know the diameter of every part of your body?
In any case, I've got my halloween costume. It's not quite what I envisioned in my head, but I think it will do the trick. This is either the best idea or the worst idea I've ever had.
Photos are probably a must.
In any case, I've got my halloween costume. It's not quite what I envisioned in my head, but I think it will do the trick. This is either the best idea or the worst idea I've ever had.
Photos are probably a must.
10.03.2007
Adrift and At Peace
I departed from Burnaby on a Sunday with headphones on, suitcase in hand, and a backpack slung over my shoulders.
A skytrain to downtown. A 45-minute bus to the terminal. A 1.5 hour ferry across the straight. A half-hour drive to Schooner Cover. I arrived mid-afternoon.
I'd covered a lot of ground in the first day, and we hadn't even embarked on our trip yet.
That changed soon enough. The wind was blowing, the sun was shining, and I was among friends and family.
The wind didn't always cooperate. Most days we didn't even raise the sails. Captain Lockhart set the autopilot while the navigator checked his GPS, then we'd start the motor and head to our next destination.
We'd arrive in port mid-afternoon each day and spend time relaxing on deck or exploring the local villas. In the evening it was off to a pub for dinner.
There were no rival pirate ships, and no sunken treasure. But after a rather uneventful summer spent mostly indoors, a good cruise in the sun was exactly what I needed.
9.09.2007
Leaving the World Behind
I'm going on vacation with my parents. We'll be sailing the Straight of Georgia for a week. I'm really looking forward to it. There's something really great about being able to drift on the ocean waters with not a care in the world other than where you'll port for the night. Life has been busy lately, so this is a much needed vacation.
Of course, when I get back I'm going to need a vacation from my vacation. Being on a boat for days on end surrounded by nothing but water and distant shorelines can also make a person feel trapped after a while.
In any case, I'll be relaxing and enjoying myself while everybody else is working hard at their jobs. Nya nya na nya nya!
Maybe I'll bring back some photos.
Of course, when I get back I'm going to need a vacation from my vacation. Being on a boat for days on end surrounded by nothing but water and distant shorelines can also make a person feel trapped after a while.
In any case, I'll be relaxing and enjoying myself while everybody else is working hard at their jobs. Nya nya na nya nya!
Maybe I'll bring back some photos.
9.03.2007
Host Migration Successful
I've moved. It's finally over. Well, almost. I still have to :
1) Finish unpacking a few boxes,
2) Decide which of my things to donate to whoever will take it
3) Discard of of those items which I feel I don't really need anymore (Like the rest of my family, I'm a bit of a pack-rat
4) Decide which boxes that I rarely look in deserve a permanent spot in the bedroom closet, and which ones should go to storage on the assumption that I'll never look in them again until I move.
5) Return to my old room at the old residence to patch up a few nail holes and clean the walls a bit
6) Set up my stereo, TV, and X360 as my reward to myself for getting the all the rest done.
*Sigh*. I hate looking at this list. It's a number of rather small tasks that won't take much time or effort (except maybe #5) to accomplish. But I just want this to be done and over with so I can relax and enjoy my new home.
Maybe a soak in the hot-tub will ease the stress. :-)
(As usual, any and all bikini-clad girls are welcome to join me.)
1) Finish unpacking a few boxes,
2) Decide which of my things to donate to whoever will take it
3) Discard of of those items which I feel I don't really need anymore (Like the rest of my family, I'm a bit of a pack-rat
4) Decide which boxes that I rarely look in deserve a permanent spot in the bedroom closet, and which ones should go to storage on the assumption that I'll never look in them again until I move.
5) Return to my old room at the old residence to patch up a few nail holes and clean the walls a bit
6) Set up my stereo, TV, and X360 as my reward to myself for getting the all the rest done.
*Sigh*. I hate looking at this list. It's a number of rather small tasks that won't take much time or effort (except maybe #5) to accomplish. But I just want this to be done and over with so I can relax and enjoy my new home.
Maybe a soak in the hot-tub will ease the stress. :-)
(As usual, any and all bikini-clad girls are welcome to join me.)
8.15.2007
Looking Back
Please bear with me. I'm feelinging a little sentimental.
Every person's life is like a story being written. Except the characters are also the authors. We write the story that we want others to read.
Almost 4 years ago I made a decision to move to BC to chase my dream career. It wasn't an easy decision to come to. I knew Vancouver was the city to go to to find the knowledge and experience I needed to reach that goal. But it meant leaving behind a lot of dear friends and everything familiar in order to go out and face the unknown.
I'd been in Edmonton for 4 years, off and on. It was just starting to feel like a home to me. I had a girlfriend, a job, a great big circle of friends, hobbies, and lots of family close by. My bills were paid, I had very little stress, and I was really enjoying life.
But I felt restless at the same time. I felt like I was standing still, just waiting for something to happen. I crave change, variety, and progress. Despite all the great things I had going for me, I felt stagnant.
I don't believe exciting things will ever just happen if you wait for them. I think most times you have to make them happen on your own. And so I decided it was time to close that chapter of my life and start writing a new one. I applied to school, made moving arrangements, put my life in a box, and shipped it off over the Rockies.
I planned a moving-away party. I invited everybody I knew. We ate, danced, drank, laughed, cried, and had a good time. At the end of the evening I said my so longs. Everybody asked me, "when will you move back?"
"We'll see," I'd answer, cringing. I already knew the answer. This wasn't like the first time I left Edmonton to go to school. I wasn't planning on going back.
The next day I hitched a ride to the airport with some friends, gave them goodbye hugs, and stepped on a plane destined for my future. One way ticket.
I found a place to live. I moved around a bit. I went to school. I snagged a good job that makes me happy. I made new friends. It's been 4 years. And every time I flip back to that previous chapter I see all the great things I had.
To those I left behind: Most of this current chapter is filler. It's here to progress the story and establish a few new characters. But all of you were the characters that mattered most. You're the ones who shaped me, who characterized me. You're the ones who were with me in the beginning, who are always in the background, and will be with me at the end. I count myself very lucky to have as many close friends as I do, and countless memories to go with them.
It's been 4 years. I'm always surprised and a little flattered when somebody asks that same question, or makes suggestions like "you should move back to Alberta". It's nice to know they care, and that if I returned tomorrow they'd welcome me back with open arms. It's always great to visit them, and always hard to leave.
But I like where this story is going. After 4 years, my answer hasn't changed. When will I be going back?
We'll see.
Every person's life is like a story being written. Except the characters are also the authors. We write the story that we want others to read.
Almost 4 years ago I made a decision to move to BC to chase my dream career. It wasn't an easy decision to come to. I knew Vancouver was the city to go to to find the knowledge and experience I needed to reach that goal. But it meant leaving behind a lot of dear friends and everything familiar in order to go out and face the unknown.
I'd been in Edmonton for 4 years, off and on. It was just starting to feel like a home to me. I had a girlfriend, a job, a great big circle of friends, hobbies, and lots of family close by. My bills were paid, I had very little stress, and I was really enjoying life.
But I felt restless at the same time. I felt like I was standing still, just waiting for something to happen. I crave change, variety, and progress. Despite all the great things I had going for me, I felt stagnant.
I don't believe exciting things will ever just happen if you wait for them. I think most times you have to make them happen on your own. And so I decided it was time to close that chapter of my life and start writing a new one. I applied to school, made moving arrangements, put my life in a box, and shipped it off over the Rockies.
I planned a moving-away party. I invited everybody I knew. We ate, danced, drank, laughed, cried, and had a good time. At the end of the evening I said my so longs. Everybody asked me, "when will you move back?"
"We'll see," I'd answer, cringing. I already knew the answer. This wasn't like the first time I left Edmonton to go to school. I wasn't planning on going back.
The next day I hitched a ride to the airport with some friends, gave them goodbye hugs, and stepped on a plane destined for my future. One way ticket.
I found a place to live. I moved around a bit. I went to school. I snagged a good job that makes me happy. I made new friends. It's been 4 years. And every time I flip back to that previous chapter I see all the great things I had.
To those I left behind: Most of this current chapter is filler. It's here to progress the story and establish a few new characters. But all of you were the characters that mattered most. You're the ones who shaped me, who characterized me. You're the ones who were with me in the beginning, who are always in the background, and will be with me at the end. I count myself very lucky to have as many close friends as I do, and countless memories to go with them.
It's been 4 years. I'm always surprised and a little flattered when somebody asks that same question, or makes suggestions like "you should move back to Alberta". It's nice to know they care, and that if I returned tomorrow they'd welcome me back with open arms. It's always great to visit them, and always hard to leave.
But I like where this story is going. After 4 years, my answer hasn't changed. When will I be going back?
We'll see.
8.06.2007
Help! - Roommate Needed
Hey everybody,
I'm looking for a roommate, and a place to live. I'm trying to find a decent 2-bedroom place in the burnaby area, somewhere reasonably near the skytrain. (But not near Edmonds...). If you know anybody who is looking for a roommate, please let them know I'm looking and to get in touch with me.
I'm quiet, clean, and responsible. I don't party, don't smoke, and don't own any pets. I'm looking for a roommate, male or female, who shares the same qualities, is easy to get along with, and is respectful of personal space.
I've already given my 30 days notice, so I need to find somebody soon. Please pass along the word.
I'm looking for a roommate, and a place to live. I'm trying to find a decent 2-bedroom place in the burnaby area, somewhere reasonably near the skytrain. (But not near Edmonds...). If you know anybody who is looking for a roommate, please let them know I'm looking and to get in touch with me.
I'm quiet, clean, and responsible. I don't party, don't smoke, and don't own any pets. I'm looking for a roommate, male or female, who shares the same qualities, is easy to get along with, and is respectful of personal space.
I've already given my 30 days notice, so I need to find somebody soon. Please pass along the word.
8.03.2007
A Fragment for Friday
I'm one of those people who likes to watch people. And I notice that quite often I see people I'm half-convinced that I know, have met, or have seen before. In most of these cases, they're actually total strangers and I've never met or seen them before in my life.
And quite often I'll see one of these strangers, and they'll bear a resemblance to a friend. Maybe a bit older, maybe a bit scragglier, or maybe slightly more mature and more attractive. And I'll think to myself "Gee, that's what [name of friend] will look like when they grow up."
And then I remember my age, and the age of my friends, and I think to myself, "Oh, yeah. Right. Nevermind."
And quite often I'll see one of these strangers, and they'll bear a resemblance to a friend. Maybe a bit older, maybe a bit scragglier, or maybe slightly more mature and more attractive. And I'll think to myself "Gee, that's what [name of friend] will look like when they grow up."
And then I remember my age, and the age of my friends, and I think to myself, "Oh, yeah. Right. Nevermind."
7.31.2007
Christmas (list) in July
I often find that I come up with great ideas for things to put on my christmas list. But for some reason, these ideas always come to me long before christmas has happened. Inevitably by the time the holiday season rolls around I've forgotten all those great ideas. And then family members start asking me for ideas and lists, but of course I have none.
So this year I'm getting an early head-start. That way, if I can't remember, I can come back to my blog and I'll have a short-but-handy list available.
My Summer Xmas List
1) CD player alarm clock - I find I have an easier time getting up in morning if I'm listening to something pleasant, instead of that ear-splitting chirping noise that my alarm clock makes. My old stereo had a wake-up feature that worked wonders, but then it quit working. A new CD-player alarm clock would be a great thing to have. Just imagine waking up to the soothing sound of a distorted kick-drum!
2) A beard trimmer - I have facial hair that needs to be trimmed far more often than I actually trim it. The only means I have to do so is an old electric razor that needs to be pre-charged every time I want to use it because the battery is shot. Said razor has a "long hair trimmer", but it's not really the right tool for the job. I think I'd be more diligent about grooming my facial hair if I had a beard trimmer. (And, on a totally vain note, being better groomed makes a person more attractive to the opposite sex.)
3) Teflon-coated frying pan / skillet - I'm a guy. I can barely cook, if you can even call it that. My pans don't have teflon coatings, and butter and cooking oil just don't to the trick. I think you get the picture.
4) An office-style desk chair - I'm pretty sure I'd save a small fortune on chiropractic each year if I had a better computer chair at my desk. I paid about $40 for the chair I'm using, which I got at Walmart. The cushion is pounded pretty flat now, and it's not very comfortable, and definitely doesn't promote good posture. I think a nicer office-style chair in the $200-$400 range, maybe made of leather, would fix that right up. Improved health through more luxurious living!
5) LCD monitor - My computer monitor is a 19" CRT that takes up roughly 1/3 of the surface area of my desktop. My printer takes up another 1/3. There just isn't much room on this desk to put things after that. An LCD monitor would only take a fraction of the desk space and would really unclutter my living space a bit.
So this year I'm getting an early head-start. That way, if I can't remember, I can come back to my blog and I'll have a short-but-handy list available.
My Summer Xmas List
1) CD player alarm clock - I find I have an easier time getting up in morning if I'm listening to something pleasant, instead of that ear-splitting chirping noise that my alarm clock makes. My old stereo had a wake-up feature that worked wonders, but then it quit working. A new CD-player alarm clock would be a great thing to have. Just imagine waking up to the soothing sound of a distorted kick-drum!
2) A beard trimmer - I have facial hair that needs to be trimmed far more often than I actually trim it. The only means I have to do so is an old electric razor that needs to be pre-charged every time I want to use it because the battery is shot. Said razor has a "long hair trimmer", but it's not really the right tool for the job. I think I'd be more diligent about grooming my facial hair if I had a beard trimmer. (And, on a totally vain note, being better groomed makes a person more attractive to the opposite sex.)
3) Teflon-coated frying pan / skillet - I'm a guy. I can barely cook, if you can even call it that. My pans don't have teflon coatings, and butter and cooking oil just don't to the trick. I think you get the picture.
4) An office-style desk chair - I'm pretty sure I'd save a small fortune on chiropractic each year if I had a better computer chair at my desk. I paid about $40 for the chair I'm using, which I got at Walmart. The cushion is pounded pretty flat now, and it's not very comfortable, and definitely doesn't promote good posture. I think a nicer office-style chair in the $200-$400 range, maybe made of leather, would fix that right up. Improved health through more luxurious living!
5) LCD monitor - My computer monitor is a 19" CRT that takes up roughly 1/3 of the surface area of my desktop. My printer takes up another 1/3. There just isn't much room on this desk to put things after that. An LCD monitor would only take a fraction of the desk space and would really unclutter my living space a bit.
7.19.2007
Do I Need My Head Examined?
I've been struggling a little at work with my co-worker as of late. He was hired on about 2 months ago to help me test the project I'm on. Now it's not that I don't like the guy (though he is the person I like least of all the people I work with), but he just hasn't been that helpful. I could tell from day one that he wasn't interested in testing, and he didn't have any experience doing it either. I've done my best to try and provide guidance and be patient, but it's always seemed to me that he doesn't quite get it, and probably doesn't want to. He's always seemed more intersted in what everybody else is doing, and negligent of his actual job role as a QA tester.
For example, if I don't give him a specific task he'll make comments like "Well, I don't really have anything to do, so I'm gonna surf the web for a while." Argh. Anybody who's tested a game knows that there is ALWAYS something to do, specific task or no. At times I've felt like a bit like a babysitter.
I eventually decided that I was being silly and irrational and should just accept that I have to work with him, and so I've done my best to keep him busy, and I honestly have needed his help. But I've always had this sense that he'd be happier designing levels, which is what his background is in. I've been secretly hoping that he would get promoted to jr. level designer so that he'd be doing something he's actually interested in, and more importantly so that I won't have to work directly with him any more.
Well, I ran into him this evening downtown. I had the day off, and apparently while I was out he was promoted! Hooray! My hopes came true. The downside here is that now I'm stuck testing a game on my own without any help, so that sucks. But at least if we hire somebody to fill his position I can hope to find somebody who's interested and competent when it comes to QA.
So I'm really happy about the fact that my slacker co-worker got promoted. I'm pretty sure there's something wrong with me.
You'd probably think I'd be upset about not being promoted myself, especially given that I've been there longer. But the truth is I have the same opportunity that he had and I'm confident that I can get the same promotion in time if I ask for it. But right now, I'm now sure what exactly it is I want to do, and I feel like where I'm needed most is doing exactly what I'm already doing. So I'm going to see this through for a while. I'll be able to climb that ladder to that next rung in due time. Maybe even before the end of the year.
You know what? Heck, I'm going to make that a personal goal. I'm going to decide what I want to do besides QA before the end of the summer, and strive for a promotion before year's end. How's that for determination?
For example, if I don't give him a specific task he'll make comments like "Well, I don't really have anything to do, so I'm gonna surf the web for a while." Argh. Anybody who's tested a game knows that there is ALWAYS something to do, specific task or no. At times I've felt like a bit like a babysitter.
I eventually decided that I was being silly and irrational and should just accept that I have to work with him, and so I've done my best to keep him busy, and I honestly have needed his help. But I've always had this sense that he'd be happier designing levels, which is what his background is in. I've been secretly hoping that he would get promoted to jr. level designer so that he'd be doing something he's actually interested in, and more importantly so that I won't have to work directly with him any more.
Well, I ran into him this evening downtown. I had the day off, and apparently while I was out he was promoted! Hooray! My hopes came true. The downside here is that now I'm stuck testing a game on my own without any help, so that sucks. But at least if we hire somebody to fill his position I can hope to find somebody who's interested and competent when it comes to QA.
So I'm really happy about the fact that my slacker co-worker got promoted. I'm pretty sure there's something wrong with me.
You'd probably think I'd be upset about not being promoted myself, especially given that I've been there longer. But the truth is I have the same opportunity that he had and I'm confident that I can get the same promotion in time if I ask for it. But right now, I'm now sure what exactly it is I want to do, and I feel like where I'm needed most is doing exactly what I'm already doing. So I'm going to see this through for a while. I'll be able to climb that ladder to that next rung in due time. Maybe even before the end of the year.
You know what? Heck, I'm going to make that a personal goal. I'm going to decide what I want to do besides QA before the end of the summer, and strive for a promotion before year's end. How's that for determination?
7.15.2007
Another Lazy Sunday
I walked to the edge of the world today. I stood at an intersection where the chaos of civilization meets the serenity of nature. I let my feet sink into the mud, and felt the water wash over them. I walked on the tidal flats where many have walked before but left no trace of their passing.
The cool air breeze brought a gentle sense of calm to me. For a few hours, I just closed my eyes and let my thoughts slip away into time, while I basked in the sand in that place between worlds.
Days like these are best shared with others, and so I brought a few good friends on my journey. The sun didn't show his face much today, but we didn't mind.
The summer is disappearing too quickly. There need to be more days like these.
The cool air breeze brought a gentle sense of calm to me. For a few hours, I just closed my eyes and let my thoughts slip away into time, while I basked in the sand in that place between worlds.
Days like these are best shared with others, and so I brought a few good friends on my journey. The sun didn't show his face much today, but we didn't mind.
The summer is disappearing too quickly. There need to be more days like these.
7.13.2007
Temporal Rift
Apparently my blog has been spitting out the worng times ever since I started it. Somehow I didn't notice. And then, when it was last pointed out to me, I forgot.
I'd like to say it's fixed now. But I checked my timezone settings, and they were set correctly. So I haven't really done anything to fix the problem. I'm going to hope that re-saving the settings just magically fixes the problem. And I won't know until I click "publish post".
I'd like to say it's fixed now. But I checked my timezone settings, and they were set correctly. So I haven't really done anything to fix the problem. I'm going to hope that re-saving the settings just magically fixes the problem. And I won't know until I click "publish post".
7.11.2007
Aww, Screw It!
You know what the great thing about computers is? If you say something, and regret it later, you can actually go back and censor yourself. Just like I've done below.
I suddenly realized at some point this evening that I was inexplicably stressing over comments made by whom I can only assume is a complete stranger. And why should I have to defend myself or justify my feelings and actions to that person anyways? It's silly. If there's something I pride myself in it's that I'm very self aware and live my own life on my own terms. I shouldn't feel like I have to explain myself to complete strangers, and so I'm not going to.
But what's even more silly is that I felt ridiculous posting those last 2 entries in the first place, knowing full well that somebody would misunderstand or misinterpret the posts. The fact that I felt the need to put up a disclaimer should have told my internal censor to just hit "delete" in the first place. So I've removed the posts. Less misplaced stress for me, and less confusion and unneeded concern for everybody else.
Besides, when I started this blog and replaced my old online journal I promised myself that I would try to keep this a positive space and to curb the negativity. I should know better than to write a blog post when I'm feeling down. Mistake made, lesson learned.
Now if only I could delete all the garbage and dirty dishes lying around our house...
I suddenly realized at some point this evening that I was inexplicably stressing over comments made by whom I can only assume is a complete stranger. And why should I have to defend myself or justify my feelings and actions to that person anyways? It's silly. If there's something I pride myself in it's that I'm very self aware and live my own life on my own terms. I shouldn't feel like I have to explain myself to complete strangers, and so I'm not going to.
But what's even more silly is that I felt ridiculous posting those last 2 entries in the first place, knowing full well that somebody would misunderstand or misinterpret the posts. The fact that I felt the need to put up a disclaimer should have told my internal censor to just hit "delete" in the first place. So I've removed the posts. Less misplaced stress for me, and less confusion and unneeded concern for everybody else.
Besides, when I started this blog and replaced my old online journal I promised myself that I would try to keep this a positive space and to curb the negativity. I should know better than to write a blog post when I'm feeling down. Mistake made, lesson learned.
Now if only I could delete all the garbage and dirty dishes lying around our house...
7.10.2007
7.08.2007
7.05.2007
I Need a Cold Shower
I bitched and moaned and complained the last few weeks because all it did was rain between short 5 minute bursts of sun. Now that it's finally sunny and hot, all I can think about is how much I miss the cooler weather.
The solution, clearly, is to spend a whole lotta time at the beach while it's nice. Preferably with some good company and a few cold beverages. And especially if said company were a company of bikini-clad girls.
So... Are there any bikini-clad girls out there who want to join me at the beach? Oh, wait a minute. You've probably got better things to do than read my blog. Heck, you're probably already at the beach.
Man, I'd sure love to be at the beach right now. Instead of in my boiling hot room getting ready to go to bed and futiley attempt to sleep in the brutally hot weather.
Maybe I'll get lucky and dream about being at the beach, feeling the cool ocean breeze blow across my skin, while sipping a tasty cold drink. Assuming I can even fall asleep.
Tomorrow maybe I'll make plans to actually go to the beach this weekend, since this hot weather trend is supposed to continue.
Ladies in Bikinis? Are you with me? Beach on the weekend? Anybody? ... Last chance...
Well, okay then. Your loss. More cold drinks for me.
The solution, clearly, is to spend a whole lotta time at the beach while it's nice. Preferably with some good company and a few cold beverages. And especially if said company were a company of bikini-clad girls.
So... Are there any bikini-clad girls out there who want to join me at the beach? Oh, wait a minute. You've probably got better things to do than read my blog. Heck, you're probably already at the beach.
Man, I'd sure love to be at the beach right now. Instead of in my boiling hot room getting ready to go to bed and futiley attempt to sleep in the brutally hot weather.
Maybe I'll get lucky and dream about being at the beach, feeling the cool ocean breeze blow across my skin, while sipping a tasty cold drink. Assuming I can even fall asleep.
Tomorrow maybe I'll make plans to actually go to the beach this weekend, since this hot weather trend is supposed to continue.
Ladies in Bikinis? Are you with me? Beach on the weekend? Anybody? ... Last chance...
Well, okay then. Your loss. More cold drinks for me.
6.26.2007
Did Pinhead Take Fish Oil Too?
I went for my first visit to a naturopath and accupuncturist today. It was quite the experience. Sitting in an armchair with little pins stuck in your face and hands is an interesting way to spend 10 minutes. It doesn't hurt much, although a few spots on my face were a little sensitive when the pins initially went in. Afterwards, though, I'm still feeling strange sensitive sensations in all the spots where the pins were stuck. Perhaps my chi is realigning itself? My stomache feels a bit funny too, but that's probably hunger. And it's a good thing I'm not squeamish about needles anymore.
In any case, I'm happy with my decision to try this out as a solution to my allergies, although I'm a little concered with all the supplements the doc prescribed. Part of my reasoning in persuing alternate means of allergy treatment was to try to avoid spending too much money on pills that didn't help. Instead, I now have 3 different natural supplements to take. The difference between a supplement and a pill? One is made from natural ingredients. But I can't say I'm really excited to be spending a ton of money on hippie-friendly pills instead of the chemical kind. And I'm skeptical that if the chemical pills don't help why should the supplements be any different?
In any case, I'm going to continue having pins stuck in me and see how it goes, but I'm going to try and slowly weasel my way out of all the supplements.
Ideally, somebody would come up with a magic cure to my problem. But since there's no such thing, I guess the magic of chinese medicine will have to do.
In any case, I'm happy with my decision to try this out as a solution to my allergies, although I'm a little concered with all the supplements the doc prescribed. Part of my reasoning in persuing alternate means of allergy treatment was to try to avoid spending too much money on pills that didn't help. Instead, I now have 3 different natural supplements to take. The difference between a supplement and a pill? One is made from natural ingredients. But I can't say I'm really excited to be spending a ton of money on hippie-friendly pills instead of the chemical kind. And I'm skeptical that if the chemical pills don't help why should the supplements be any different?
In any case, I'm going to continue having pins stuck in me and see how it goes, but I'm going to try and slowly weasel my way out of all the supplements.
Ideally, somebody would come up with a magic cure to my problem. But since there's no such thing, I guess the magic of chinese medicine will have to do.
6.15.2007
Down with Crippled Cell Phones!
So I got a little bored tonight and decided to plug my phone into my PC and see if I can remove the Telus default menus and icons. See, the default colors, images, tones, and backgrounds are all set by Telus and are different than the menu items that would ship with a stock non-branded Nokia phone of the same model.
The way to remove the Telus images and icons is well documented online and seems like it should be very easy to do. In fact, with the right software and a data cable, it should be a simple matter of removing one file from the phone.
However, the instructions also make a note of backing up a series of files to your PC first, in case something goes wrong. This is always good advice. But the software required to copy these files requires you to purchase a full license for $40. Otherwise, you can only copy a few files before the demo license restricts you from going any further. I haven't been able to locate a crack to work around this.
I'm tempted to just delete the file and see what happens. At the very least, I can back up that same one file. In theory, if I screw things up all I need to do is replace that file again. I shouldn't even need to worry about that other folder I'm told to back up.
But you never know with these sorts of things. Removing that file could have other unforseen consequences. And if I do this and it fails miserably, I'm not just out a file and some icons on my phone. I'll essentially be screwing up my phone and necessitating the purchase of a new one. That's another $400 I'll be looking at spending, instead of a measly $40 to back up the files. On the other hand, if I try it and it works it won't cost a thing and I'll be happy.
I think I'm going to sleep on it, before I make such a rash decision. Who knew that deleting a little tiny data file could be such a big decision.
The way to remove the Telus images and icons is well documented online and seems like it should be very easy to do. In fact, with the right software and a data cable, it should be a simple matter of removing one file from the phone.
However, the instructions also make a note of backing up a series of files to your PC first, in case something goes wrong. This is always good advice. But the software required to copy these files requires you to purchase a full license for $40. Otherwise, you can only copy a few files before the demo license restricts you from going any further. I haven't been able to locate a crack to work around this.
I'm tempted to just delete the file and see what happens. At the very least, I can back up that same one file. In theory, if I screw things up all I need to do is replace that file again. I shouldn't even need to worry about that other folder I'm told to back up.
But you never know with these sorts of things. Removing that file could have other unforseen consequences. And if I do this and it fails miserably, I'm not just out a file and some icons on my phone. I'll essentially be screwing up my phone and necessitating the purchase of a new one. That's another $400 I'll be looking at spending, instead of a measly $40 to back up the files. On the other hand, if I try it and it works it won't cost a thing and I'll be happy.
I think I'm going to sleep on it, before I make such a rash decision. Who knew that deleting a little tiny data file could be such a big decision.
6.13.2007
Things That Have Made My Week
1.) Checking my work e-mail from out of town to discover that I've been granted an MVP award for my efforts on my project over the past month. Said aware also comes with a certificate for dinner and a movie for two.
(I'm still working on the "two" part before I use them.)
2.) Having a bonus added to my paycheque this week for appreciated proactiveness at work. This is in addition to, and separate from, the aforementioned MVP award.
3.) Finding out that I've passed my 90 day probation and will be recieving full extended benefits as of friday.
4.) Having a personal compliment paid directly to me by the CEO for some additional work I've been doing to help improve productivity. Again, this is separate from points 1, 2, and 3.
5.) Knowing that numbers 2 and 3 mean that I can get my bike fixed this week, see my chiropractor again, and book and appointment with my dentist. Further steps to living healthier!
(I'm still working on the "two" part before I use them.)
2.) Having a bonus added to my paycheque this week for appreciated proactiveness at work. This is in addition to, and separate from, the aforementioned MVP award.
3.) Finding out that I've passed my 90 day probation and will be recieving full extended benefits as of friday.
4.) Having a personal compliment paid directly to me by the CEO for some additional work I've been doing to help improve productivity. Again, this is separate from points 1, 2, and 3.
5.) Knowing that numbers 2 and 3 mean that I can get my bike fixed this week, see my chiropractor again, and book and appointment with my dentist. Further steps to living healthier!
6.05.2007
Audible Fragments
Check out the new link I just added on the left.
If any of the links on that page are dead, please let me know.
If any of the links on that page are dead, please let me know.
5.29.2007
A Weight Has Been Lifted From My Shoulders
I couldn't take it anymore. The fact that I felt I had to go a third time in 2 months was probably a sign.
The hair has been chopped off. It looks and feels so much better. And it's much more summer-friendly. I'd post a pic, but it wasn't a flattering pic. So maybe I'll do it later.
The hair has been chopped off. It looks and feels so much better. And it's much more summer-friendly. I'd post a pic, but it wasn't a flattering pic. So maybe I'll do it later.
5.19.2007
Naivety
I'm returning home from the Frontline Assembly show, riding a musically charged high. I step off the skytrain, cross the pedway, and step onto the escalator that leads down to the bus loop.
A young man with a back-pack is waiting at the bottom. He's one of those characters who's misleading appearance hides their age. He could be in his teens, he could be in his 20's. It's hard to say, and it doesn't matter.
As I get halfway down the escalator he beckons to me. I give him a confused look. He beckons again as I step off the escalator and onto the pavement. "'Have a light?"
"No, I don't," I reply. He reaches into his pocket, motions me to come closer. It's as if he's got something special to show me. Some secret that he doesn't want anybody else on the platform to know about. I'm expecting he'll offer to sell me some drugs.
Instead, he produceds a package of Player's Lights, pulls a cigarette from the carton, and holds it upwards towards me. He might be offering it to me, but he doesn't say anything, and I'm not sure I understand his intentions. Besides which, I don't smoke and so I'm not interested. "I don't have a light," I repeat, and I shrug with my hands still stuffed in my jacket pockets.
"What's that?" he gestures at my right pocket.
"It's a CD". I quickly flash the side of the disc inside my pocket before returning my hands-in-pockets to their sides. The next thing I know he's grabbing at my coat and reaching into my pocket, brushing my hand away, asking again "What's that"?
"It's a CD". I'm confused, but calm.
"What the fuck is it"?
"It's Frontline Assembly". An honest answer, not that it means anything to him.
He wrenches the CD out of the pocket and takes two quick steps backwards, waving me away. "Get lost," he says. I stare at him. He takes two more steps back, I take two forward. "Just go," he says. I glance over his shoulder to see if mall security are nearby, but they're not.
He spreads his arms wide, holding the CD away from me, beginning to circle around, putting a garbage bin between us. I take a few steps sideways and forward. We're circle-strafing each other, just like in a video game. Except this isn't a game. This is addiction versus addiction. His irrational need for money, for posessions, for showing dominance. My irrational need for a flat circular piece of plastic, of which I own many, that holds 60 minutes of music.
"Oh, you wanna fight?" he asks, holdling his arms out to make himself look bigger than his scrawny build will allow anybody to believe.
"No, I just want the CD back," I say calmly. He continues backing off, circling. I continue my advance, confused and a little angry.
"Let's go, c'mon, bring it." He throws a feeble slow motion fist towards my face. I've seen toddlers throw a better punch. He seems off balance. It dawns on me that he's probably on something, and his judgement probably isn't very good. The punch passes a foot beyond my face and he stumbles slightly.
"Just give me the CD."
He begins to retreat up the escalator, and I realize he's trying to rob me. I've let people walk all over me before, too often maybe, but not this time. I'm not going to fight him, but I'm not leaving without the CD back in my pocket.
He turns, and runs up a few steps, putting more distance between himself and me. I pursue at a steady pace, stepping onto the escalator. I hold the handrail on either side, lock eyes with him. I don't smile, and I don't yell. I keep a straight face.
He looks at me, casts a look over his shoulder behind him, then back down at me. My mind is clear, and my eyes say it all. It's at this moment that he realizes that I'm not going to stop following him, and he doesn't have very far to run.
He steps up another step, crouches, puts the CD on the escalator stair between his feet, and then turns and runs. I take the CD, back down the escalator, and place the disc back in my pocket. The night is quiet and the air is still.
I'm not sure how to feel. Just when I was starting to feel like it's time to stop guarding my feelings and emotions so closely, and to start letting people in...
some screwed up asshole decides to do something that makes me want to be even more guarded and closed. I feel foolish and naive for trusting a complete stranger. I begin to fantasize about all the nasty things I could have done to him. I imagine tripping him, holding him down against the pavement, kicking him in the ribs. In my mind I play out beating his head against the stone until it bleeds into the cracks.
I feel a little frightened afterwards, and a little worried about my personal security. But nobody got hurt, and I didn't get robbed. I stood my ground, stood up for myself and my personal rights, and I did it without any need for violence.
There seems to be a misconception that pacifists are weaklings and cowards. I disagree. Our strenght is in our willpower, our convictions, our clarity of mind.
But I still worry, if that first punch had made contact, what would I have done? Could I have held my composure? And what if this happens again? And will I be as lucky a second time?
I'm still tackling with my feelings about this encounter. I'm not sure what to think or feel. But I do know this: If there's a next time, maybe I'll just let it go. It's just a CD, just a piece of plastic. I can always buy another one. A life and a soul are much harder to replace.
A young man with a back-pack is waiting at the bottom. He's one of those characters who's misleading appearance hides their age. He could be in his teens, he could be in his 20's. It's hard to say, and it doesn't matter.
As I get halfway down the escalator he beckons to me. I give him a confused look. He beckons again as I step off the escalator and onto the pavement. "'Have a light?"
"No, I don't," I reply. He reaches into his pocket, motions me to come closer. It's as if he's got something special to show me. Some secret that he doesn't want anybody else on the platform to know about. I'm expecting he'll offer to sell me some drugs.
Instead, he produceds a package of Player's Lights, pulls a cigarette from the carton, and holds it upwards towards me. He might be offering it to me, but he doesn't say anything, and I'm not sure I understand his intentions. Besides which, I don't smoke and so I'm not interested. "I don't have a light," I repeat, and I shrug with my hands still stuffed in my jacket pockets.
"What's that?" he gestures at my right pocket.
"It's a CD". I quickly flash the side of the disc inside my pocket before returning my hands-in-pockets to their sides. The next thing I know he's grabbing at my coat and reaching into my pocket, brushing my hand away, asking again "What's that"?
"It's a CD". I'm confused, but calm.
"What the fuck is it"?
"It's Frontline Assembly". An honest answer, not that it means anything to him.
He wrenches the CD out of the pocket and takes two quick steps backwards, waving me away. "Get lost," he says. I stare at him. He takes two more steps back, I take two forward. "Just go," he says. I glance over his shoulder to see if mall security are nearby, but they're not.
He spreads his arms wide, holding the CD away from me, beginning to circle around, putting a garbage bin between us. I take a few steps sideways and forward. We're circle-strafing each other, just like in a video game. Except this isn't a game. This is addiction versus addiction. His irrational need for money, for posessions, for showing dominance. My irrational need for a flat circular piece of plastic, of which I own many, that holds 60 minutes of music.
"Oh, you wanna fight?" he asks, holdling his arms out to make himself look bigger than his scrawny build will allow anybody to believe.
"No, I just want the CD back," I say calmly. He continues backing off, circling. I continue my advance, confused and a little angry.
"Let's go, c'mon, bring it." He throws a feeble slow motion fist towards my face. I've seen toddlers throw a better punch. He seems off balance. It dawns on me that he's probably on something, and his judgement probably isn't very good. The punch passes a foot beyond my face and he stumbles slightly.
"Just give me the CD."
He begins to retreat up the escalator, and I realize he's trying to rob me. I've let people walk all over me before, too often maybe, but not this time. I'm not going to fight him, but I'm not leaving without the CD back in my pocket.
He turns, and runs up a few steps, putting more distance between himself and me. I pursue at a steady pace, stepping onto the escalator. I hold the handrail on either side, lock eyes with him. I don't smile, and I don't yell. I keep a straight face.
He looks at me, casts a look over his shoulder behind him, then back down at me. My mind is clear, and my eyes say it all. It's at this moment that he realizes that I'm not going to stop following him, and he doesn't have very far to run.
He steps up another step, crouches, puts the CD on the escalator stair between his feet, and then turns and runs. I take the CD, back down the escalator, and place the disc back in my pocket. The night is quiet and the air is still.
I'm not sure how to feel. Just when I was starting to feel like it's time to stop guarding my feelings and emotions so closely, and to start letting people in...
some screwed up asshole decides to do something that makes me want to be even more guarded and closed. I feel foolish and naive for trusting a complete stranger. I begin to fantasize about all the nasty things I could have done to him. I imagine tripping him, holding him down against the pavement, kicking him in the ribs. In my mind I play out beating his head against the stone until it bleeds into the cracks.
I feel a little frightened afterwards, and a little worried about my personal security. But nobody got hurt, and I didn't get robbed. I stood my ground, stood up for myself and my personal rights, and I did it without any need for violence.
There seems to be a misconception that pacifists are weaklings and cowards. I disagree. Our strenght is in our willpower, our convictions, our clarity of mind.
But I still worry, if that first punch had made contact, what would I have done? Could I have held my composure? And what if this happens again? And will I be as lucky a second time?
I'm still tackling with my feelings about this encounter. I'm not sure what to think or feel. But I do know this: If there's a next time, maybe I'll just let it go. It's just a CD, just a piece of plastic. I can always buy another one. A life and a soul are much harder to replace.
5.15.2007
Awake and Dreaming
It started as a quiet lull. Two or three people off in a corner starting a friendly chant. A few people joined in, and then a few more. It grew louder and faster, a rythmic chant steadily increasing in tempo and amplitude, finally crescendoing in a cacophony of cheering, shouting and whistling. "Finger, Finger Finger!"
I've missed these guys. It's been a number of years since our last rendez-vous, but I felt like it was time I go see them again. The opening acts were a bit disappointing, making me a bit anxious. But as Scott Anderson, Rick Jackett, James Black and co. took the stage I became more confident that the wait had been worth it.
It's funny how the music you love stays with you. When I lived in Alberta I used to drive between Edmonton and Cold Lake alone. I'd turn up the stereo, pop in Tip or The Greyest of Blue Skies, and belt out the lyrics to every song at the top of my lungs. I'd even squeak out the higher pitched parts that my voice couldn't properly reach.
And earlier tonight, there I was standing in a room with a few thousand strangers, belting out the lyrics to all our favorite songs at the top of our collective lungs.
It's my fourth time in 8 years that I've seen them play live, and I think this has been the best performance I've seen them do so far. They're one of the few successful bands I've seen live that truly appear to be enjoying themselves and loving what they do on stage.
To heck with Nickleback, Avril Lavigne, Metric, Broken Social Scene, and all these other overrated Canadian bands. These guys have been rocking longer and harder, and they're still going strong. I've been a Finger Eleven fan since I first saw them at Edgefest in '99 and I still maintain that they're one of the best (and most under appreciated) Canadian rock bands out there. They're one of those bands that just hasn't let me down. I have a lot of great memories I associate with their songs and they're easily still in my list of Top 5 favorite bands.
And so amidst the squealing guitars and pounding bass I found myself thinking that if my hearing suddenly gave out then and there, and this was the last sound I ever heard in my lifetime, that would be just fine by me.
I just wish that I'd had the company of a few choice friends to share the night with. Going to concerts alone is always a bit - ummm - lonely. But since I didn't have friends by my side, I guess sharing my experience with the blogosphere is the next best thing.
I've missed these guys. It's been a number of years since our last rendez-vous, but I felt like it was time I go see them again. The opening acts were a bit disappointing, making me a bit anxious. But as Scott Anderson, Rick Jackett, James Black and co. took the stage I became more confident that the wait had been worth it.
It's funny how the music you love stays with you. When I lived in Alberta I used to drive between Edmonton and Cold Lake alone. I'd turn up the stereo, pop in Tip or The Greyest of Blue Skies, and belt out the lyrics to every song at the top of my lungs. I'd even squeak out the higher pitched parts that my voice couldn't properly reach.
And earlier tonight, there I was standing in a room with a few thousand strangers, belting out the lyrics to all our favorite songs at the top of our collective lungs.
It's my fourth time in 8 years that I've seen them play live, and I think this has been the best performance I've seen them do so far. They're one of the few successful bands I've seen live that truly appear to be enjoying themselves and loving what they do on stage.
To heck with Nickleback, Avril Lavigne, Metric, Broken Social Scene, and all these other overrated Canadian bands. These guys have been rocking longer and harder, and they're still going strong. I've been a Finger Eleven fan since I first saw them at Edgefest in '99 and I still maintain that they're one of the best (and most under appreciated) Canadian rock bands out there. They're one of those bands that just hasn't let me down. I have a lot of great memories I associate with their songs and they're easily still in my list of Top 5 favorite bands.
And so amidst the squealing guitars and pounding bass I found myself thinking that if my hearing suddenly gave out then and there, and this was the last sound I ever heard in my lifetime, that would be just fine by me.
I just wish that I'd had the company of a few choice friends to share the night with. Going to concerts alone is always a bit - ummm - lonely. But since I didn't have friends by my side, I guess sharing my experience with the blogosphere is the next best thing.
5.13.2007
I'm Reconnected
Yup. Internet works again. Don't know why, or what fixed it. Didn't make any sense that it quit in the first place. Now it works again. Hooray.
5.10.2007
This Message Brought to You by the Wonders of Unsecured Wireless Internet
I'm writing this post on my laptop. My other computer has decided that it no longer wishes to surf the internet. It has found contentment in being connected to the router and in turn a smaller, friendlier, safer network. Knowing all the terrible evils that lie out there on the internet, I'm not sure I blame it. Maybe it's better off without the world wide web.
I, however, am neither content 'nor impressed by this sudden decision on the part of my computer. I have tried to persuade it to give the internet another chance. I've poked, and prodded, and taunted, and even tried to trick it into connection. And when that didn't work I decided that maybe the router was being a bully and not letting my computer surf with the big boys. So I spoke to the router, but he assures me he's done no such thing.
So now I'm checking on my computer's health, and hoping not to diagnose it with any nasty bugs. I can't imagine how or where it might have contracted an illness that would cause internet-phobia as a secondary sympton, but it never hurts to be safe. I doubt I'll find anything wrong. My computer may not be as young as he once was, but he's still in good shape and gets a good work-out on a daily basis.
It could also be the result of Karma. I've been isolating myself to my room a little bit lately. Maybe my computer just thinks it's doing it's part to help me out?
In any case, I WANT THE FREAKIN' INTERNET TO WORK AGAIN!!
I, however, am neither content 'nor impressed by this sudden decision on the part of my computer. I have tried to persuade it to give the internet another chance. I've poked, and prodded, and taunted, and even tried to trick it into connection. And when that didn't work I decided that maybe the router was being a bully and not letting my computer surf with the big boys. So I spoke to the router, but he assures me he's done no such thing.
So now I'm checking on my computer's health, and hoping not to diagnose it with any nasty bugs. I can't imagine how or where it might have contracted an illness that would cause internet-phobia as a secondary sympton, but it never hurts to be safe. I doubt I'll find anything wrong. My computer may not be as young as he once was, but he's still in good shape and gets a good work-out on a daily basis.
It could also be the result of Karma. I've been isolating myself to my room a little bit lately. Maybe my computer just thinks it's doing it's part to help me out?
In any case, I WANT THE FREAKIN' INTERNET TO WORK AGAIN!!
5.06.2007
Rubbed the Wrong Way
It's times like these that make me want to move out on my own again. I like my roommates, and I lake the place I live. And most times I'm happy about my situation and things are basically fine. But there are times, like tonight, where I can't wait to get out and into my own place and distance myself from ... well ... the things I feel I need to distance myself from.
I can't elaborate much since I never know who, if anybody, is reading this. I'd like to explain in detail, but I can't. It's never nice to talk about other people behind their backs anyways, and especially not on the internet.
So to wrap it all up in a nice, neat little all-encompassing but entirely too general package, there are some people in my life who sometimes do things that drive me up the wall, and I'm just about at my wit's end with them. And it doesn't have much to do with them so much as that those things they're doing just clash with my personality and my lifestyle.
Sadly, my budget doesn't really allow me to change my situation. So until it does I'll just keep my head down, my mouth shut, and my bedroom door closed.
I also wish that the title I chose for this post was in reference to something dirty and inappropriate. Right now it's just a wasted innuendo.
I can't elaborate much since I never know who, if anybody, is reading this. I'd like to explain in detail, but I can't. It's never nice to talk about other people behind their backs anyways, and especially not on the internet.
So to wrap it all up in a nice, neat little all-encompassing but entirely too general package, there are some people in my life who sometimes do things that drive me up the wall, and I'm just about at my wit's end with them. And it doesn't have much to do with them so much as that those things they're doing just clash with my personality and my lifestyle.
Sadly, my budget doesn't really allow me to change my situation. So until it does I'll just keep my head down, my mouth shut, and my bedroom door closed.
I also wish that the title I chose for this post was in reference to something dirty and inappropriate. Right now it's just a wasted innuendo.
5.05.2007
Speechless
Ha ha. I like the title of this post. It's a pun. But of course, you don't get it yet, so let me explain.
My best friend is getting married at the end of the month. He's asked me to be the best man, and I graciously accepted. It doesn't really come as a surprise, as we've been friends a long time and I knew one day I'd be standing along side him at his wedding, the same as he will likely do for me when my time comes. I just didn't quite expect that the day would come so soon. But I guess we're getting to that age.
As part of my duties as best man I've been asked to give a toast. This news didn't come as a surprise to me either, as it seems to be pretty standard for a wedding. But the toast I've been asked to give is one welcoming the new bride.
I've only met my friend's fiancee roughly 3 or 4 times, as I no longer live in the same city they do. And so it's created a bit of a hurdle. In my mind I'm writing all these great little toasts and speeches, but they all focus around my friend. I'd happily toast the bride, except that I really don't know anything about her aside from her name and her job. I don't have anything insightful or witty to say about the two of them together, since I haven't spent much time around the two of them. I have plenty I could say about my friend, but the toast is supposed to be his fiancee, not him.
They're trying to keep the wedding small and simple, and so I suppose I could get away with a quick "To the Bride!" But I don't feel that would do justice to the occasion, and I'm sure I can do better. I guess I just have to figure out my angle. I'd like to say something a bit more personalized that has more special meaning to the two of them.
I also need to pick up a wedding gift for them. And again, it's proving to be a difficult decision for me. They've registered at a few places, but I never liked the idea of gift registries. I suppose it does makes things simple and provides them with things they really need. But I'd rather be that one cool friend who got them that one special gift that wasn't on the registry that nobody else thought of. But I'm stumped for ideas. Buying a wedding gift for a couple isn't quite the same as buying your friend a birthday gift. Especially when you're only close friends with one half of the couple, and don't know the other half very well.
Ah, well, I'm sure I'll figure something out. I always do. And besides that, if it comes down to the last minute (which it better not), I'll have my sister around to offer me some or her never-ending good advice.
My best friend is getting married at the end of the month. He's asked me to be the best man, and I graciously accepted. It doesn't really come as a surprise, as we've been friends a long time and I knew one day I'd be standing along side him at his wedding, the same as he will likely do for me when my time comes. I just didn't quite expect that the day would come so soon. But I guess we're getting to that age.
As part of my duties as best man I've been asked to give a toast. This news didn't come as a surprise to me either, as it seems to be pretty standard for a wedding. But the toast I've been asked to give is one welcoming the new bride.
I've only met my friend's fiancee roughly 3 or 4 times, as I no longer live in the same city they do. And so it's created a bit of a hurdle. In my mind I'm writing all these great little toasts and speeches, but they all focus around my friend. I'd happily toast the bride, except that I really don't know anything about her aside from her name and her job. I don't have anything insightful or witty to say about the two of them together, since I haven't spent much time around the two of them. I have plenty I could say about my friend, but the toast is supposed to be his fiancee, not him.
They're trying to keep the wedding small and simple, and so I suppose I could get away with a quick "To the Bride!" But I don't feel that would do justice to the occasion, and I'm sure I can do better. I guess I just have to figure out my angle. I'd like to say something a bit more personalized that has more special meaning to the two of them.
I also need to pick up a wedding gift for them. And again, it's proving to be a difficult decision for me. They've registered at a few places, but I never liked the idea of gift registries. I suppose it does makes things simple and provides them with things they really need. But I'd rather be that one cool friend who got them that one special gift that wasn't on the registry that nobody else thought of. But I'm stumped for ideas. Buying a wedding gift for a couple isn't quite the same as buying your friend a birthday gift. Especially when you're only close friends with one half of the couple, and don't know the other half very well.
Ah, well, I'm sure I'll figure something out. I always do. And besides that, if it comes down to the last minute (which it better not), I'll have my sister around to offer me some or her never-ending good advice.
4.29.2007
4.21.2007
So Much Energy, but No Outlet
My extended horoscope for the day:
"Your energy level and enthusiasm are going to burn right through the meager demands of your day. There just won't be much going on today -- nothing worth your fiery can-do attitude. But don't let the day's ho-hum mood disappoint you, though. Be flexible, and take the day as it comes. If you can't find an outlet for your energy, save it for another day -- it has no expiration date"
It's pretty accurate. The weekend has come, the weather's been great, and I've got oodles of excitement and energy, but nowhere to put it. I went for a bike ride, and that helped a bit. Last night there was an attempt to Glo-stick football, but the others weren't as enthusiastic about it as I was.
And now I'm sitting at home thinking about all the exciting things I could be doing, and wishing that I had a) the financial means to do them and b) people to do them with me.
Ah well. Spring is here and the sun is shining. There will be other weekends, and plenty to do.
"Your energy level and enthusiasm are going to burn right through the meager demands of your day. There just won't be much going on today -- nothing worth your fiery can-do attitude. But don't let the day's ho-hum mood disappoint you, though. Be flexible, and take the day as it comes. If you can't find an outlet for your energy, save it for another day -- it has no expiration date"
It's pretty accurate. The weekend has come, the weather's been great, and I've got oodles of excitement and energy, but nowhere to put it. I went for a bike ride, and that helped a bit. Last night there was an attempt to Glo-stick football, but the others weren't as enthusiastic about it as I was.
And now I'm sitting at home thinking about all the exciting things I could be doing, and wishing that I had a) the financial means to do them and b) people to do them with me.
Ah well. Spring is here and the sun is shining. There will be other weekends, and plenty to do.
4.17.2007
My Personal Movie Soundtrack
You know those stupid things that always show up on myspace and facebook that make you skip through your playlist and fill in the blanks for random movie events? I did one tonight on facebook, because I think the idea of having a personal soundtrack is awesome. Normally I ignore these internet quiz things, but this one was kinda fun. So I decided to share it.
Go ahead, mock my playlist. You know you want to.
What to do:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie
-----
[I'm going to use these brackets to provide a running commentary to make this more interesting. My movie starts off as a black and white art film that looks like it was done by an aspiring film student.]
Opening Credit:
Rabbit in the Headlights - Radiohead and DJ Shadow
Waking Up:
Poetry and Power - Gravity Kills
First day at High School:
Dark and Long - Underworld (Oakenfold dark train mix)
[So up to this point I'm getting the sense from the first few songs that my character takes life very seriously and is dealing with some serious drama. But then along comes the love song. Clearly the scene in which I fall in love occurs in a strip club and involves a latex-clad stripper.]
Falling in Love:
Frontline Assembly - Vanished
[The fight song, on the other hand, is so happy that it must be like a lover's quarrel complete with pillow fights, because there's no way I'd get my ass kicked to this bouncy number.]
Fight Song:
Dragonflies - Povi Muhoberac / Rizzo (uberzone in your bed mix)
(This is so NOT a fight song...)
[And then me and the stripper break up. I guess the song almost fits the scene, but the fact that I have it in my playlist may actually be the reason for the break-up.]
Breaking Up Song:
Be Like That - Three Doors Down
[Somehow during all this I became a DJ, because I'm playing my own music at my prom. How cool is that? So now the art film has become a trypical teen comedy romp.]
Prom:
Lingering in Limbo - Andrew Lockhart
(That's right, my own music is on my playlist!)
[But then comes the heavy drama again, with a certain sort of irony.]
Life:
Don't Laugh - Josh Wink
[Clearly somebody else is driving in this next scene, 'cuz I sure wouldn't be driving to the sappiest Britney song I've ever heard. Let's assume it's my closest female friend and confidante, and she's driving her car. I'm relating all my tales of woe to her, and she's offering support. ]
Driving:
Everytime - Britney Spears
[This is where the movie starts getting better and turns into a kung-fu crime drama. It turns out that up until this point the whole movie was one huge flashback. It's actually 20 years after high-school and I'm a badass detective with a drinking problem who was been heartbroken by a stripper in his teens and never recovered. ]
Flashback:
Walking Wounded - The Tea Party
[And 20 years later I meet the stripper again through circumstances invovling a crime investigation. It's messy, but we work things out through booze, fighting, and finally a big make-up make-out session.]
Getting Back Together:
Faces - Orgy
[We get married and our family life is a bit like being on the Adams Family.]
Wedding:
Oh My Goth - Razed in Black
Birth of Child:
Goth Girls - MC Frontalot
[But, OH NOES, here comes the Stripper's ex-angry-lesbian-lover. She's super jealous and high on crack, and we have to battle to the death.]
Final Battle:
Voices/Machine - Sister Machine Gun
[ Back to the drama. Having been slain by the angry lesbian, I cast away any belief in the afterlife in my final moments.]
Death Scene:
Heaven's a Lie - Lacuna Coil
[The funeral song is a symbol that I've learned nothing and will have to try again in another life]
Funeral Song:
Back to School - Deftones
[The credits roll as my wife, in her depression over my loss, seeks comfort in the arms of the drugged-out angry lesbian. They two of them proceed to snort themselves into Oblivion, leaving our gothy daughter abandoned to live on ths street.]
End Credits:
Come White - Apoptygma Berserk (Marylin Manson cover)
[The reel goes black, the house lights come back on, and the theatre patrons all ask for their money back 'cuz this movie sucked so much.]
Go ahead, mock my playlist. You know you want to.
What to do:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie
-----
[I'm going to use these brackets to provide a running commentary to make this more interesting. My movie starts off as a black and white art film that looks like it was done by an aspiring film student.]
Opening Credit:
Rabbit in the Headlights - Radiohead and DJ Shadow
Waking Up:
Poetry and Power - Gravity Kills
First day at High School:
Dark and Long - Underworld (Oakenfold dark train mix)
[So up to this point I'm getting the sense from the first few songs that my character takes life very seriously and is dealing with some serious drama. But then along comes the love song. Clearly the scene in which I fall in love occurs in a strip club and involves a latex-clad stripper.]
Falling in Love:
Frontline Assembly - Vanished
[The fight song, on the other hand, is so happy that it must be like a lover's quarrel complete with pillow fights, because there's no way I'd get my ass kicked to this bouncy number.]
Fight Song:
Dragonflies - Povi Muhoberac / Rizzo (uberzone in your bed mix)
(This is so NOT a fight song...)
[And then me and the stripper break up. I guess the song almost fits the scene, but the fact that I have it in my playlist may actually be the reason for the break-up.]
Breaking Up Song:
Be Like That - Three Doors Down
[Somehow during all this I became a DJ, because I'm playing my own music at my prom. How cool is that? So now the art film has become a trypical teen comedy romp.]
Prom:
Lingering in Limbo - Andrew Lockhart
(That's right, my own music is on my playlist!)
[But then comes the heavy drama again, with a certain sort of irony.]
Life:
Don't Laugh - Josh Wink
[Clearly somebody else is driving in this next scene, 'cuz I sure wouldn't be driving to the sappiest Britney song I've ever heard. Let's assume it's my closest female friend and confidante, and she's driving her car. I'm relating all my tales of woe to her, and she's offering support. ]
Driving:
Everytime - Britney Spears
[This is where the movie starts getting better and turns into a kung-fu crime drama. It turns out that up until this point the whole movie was one huge flashback. It's actually 20 years after high-school and I'm a badass detective with a drinking problem who was been heartbroken by a stripper in his teens and never recovered. ]
Flashback:
Walking Wounded - The Tea Party
[And 20 years later I meet the stripper again through circumstances invovling a crime investigation. It's messy, but we work things out through booze, fighting, and finally a big make-up make-out session.]
Getting Back Together:
Faces - Orgy
[We get married and our family life is a bit like being on the Adams Family.]
Wedding:
Oh My Goth - Razed in Black
Birth of Child:
Goth Girls - MC Frontalot
[But, OH NOES, here comes the Stripper's ex-angry-lesbian-lover. She's super jealous and high on crack, and we have to battle to the death.]
Final Battle:
Voices/Machine - Sister Machine Gun
[ Back to the drama. Having been slain by the angry lesbian, I cast away any belief in the afterlife in my final moments.]
Death Scene:
Heaven's a Lie - Lacuna Coil
[The funeral song is a symbol that I've learned nothing and will have to try again in another life]
Funeral Song:
Back to School - Deftones
[The credits roll as my wife, in her depression over my loss, seeks comfort in the arms of the drugged-out angry lesbian. They two of them proceed to snort themselves into Oblivion, leaving our gothy daughter abandoned to live on ths street.]
End Credits:
Come White - Apoptygma Berserk (Marylin Manson cover)
[The reel goes black, the house lights come back on, and the theatre patrons all ask for their money back 'cuz this movie sucked so much.]
4.16.2007
The Evolution of a Haircut
Alternate title: How to Post Terrible Pictures of Yourself on the Internet
Since it was requested, here are photos of my hair. I've even done you all (all five of you, 'cuz I have so many readers) one better and posted a pictorial history of my hair.
I tried to find some even older, not too mention worse, photos than these but I don't have any digitized.
So I'll kick things off with my haircut from 2001. I wore my hair this way for basically three years starting in the eleventh grade (1998) and running right through college.
This was the only change I made to my hair in that time. The haircut itself is basically the same. The only major difference is that I got bored and decided to put bright red streaks in it. That's what college is for anyways, right? To heck with learning, it's all about doing all the stupid things you need to get out of your system before you have to "grow up". Side note: I miss my red streaks, and the green spiker gel I bought just isn't the same.
College ended and I moved back to Edmonton and had to look for a job. So I got rid of the red streaks, and went back to a slightly longer variation of the previous haircut. My hair stayed like this until last summer. (The photo was taken in Vancouver in 2003)
In the summer of 2006 I got bored with my hair again, and decided I was going to grow it out. This was the beginning. Notice the familiar shape, but with longer growth on top. Personally, I think I should probably have kept it this way
This was the outcome of my experimental long hair. This is the haircut (non-haircut actually) that scared the general public and confused my grandmother. My hair looked like this up until two days ago.
After my weekend haircut, this is what I've ended up with. Granted this is a terrible picture, and it's the end of the day so it's all wind-tossed and messy.
It's still pretty long on top, except I got rid of the annoying curly fringes at the back and sides. I haven't decided if I like it or not, but I'll try it for a while. Maybe I'll get used to it.
On a completely unrelated note, look how much weight I've gained in the last 4 years! You can see it in my face. Ugh. Time to get some serious exercise.
Since it was requested, here are photos of my hair. I've even done you all (all five of you, 'cuz I have so many readers) one better and posted a pictorial history of my hair.
I tried to find some even older, not too mention worse, photos than these but I don't have any digitized.
So I'll kick things off with my haircut from 2001. I wore my hair this way for basically three years starting in the eleventh grade (1998) and running right through college.
This was the only change I made to my hair in that time. The haircut itself is basically the same. The only major difference is that I got bored and decided to put bright red streaks in it. That's what college is for anyways, right? To heck with learning, it's all about doing all the stupid things you need to get out of your system before you have to "grow up". Side note: I miss my red streaks, and the green spiker gel I bought just isn't the same.
College ended and I moved back to Edmonton and had to look for a job. So I got rid of the red streaks, and went back to a slightly longer variation of the previous haircut. My hair stayed like this until last summer. (The photo was taken in Vancouver in 2003)
In the summer of 2006 I got bored with my hair again, and decided I was going to grow it out. This was the beginning. Notice the familiar shape, but with longer growth on top. Personally, I think I should probably have kept it this way
This was the outcome of my experimental long hair. This is the haircut (non-haircut actually) that scared the general public and confused my grandmother. My hair looked like this up until two days ago.
After my weekend haircut, this is what I've ended up with. Granted this is a terrible picture, and it's the end of the day so it's all wind-tossed and messy.
It's still pretty long on top, except I got rid of the annoying curly fringes at the back and sides. I haven't decided if I like it or not, but I'll try it for a while. Maybe I'll get used to it.
On a completely unrelated note, look how much weight I've gained in the last 4 years! You can see it in my face. Ugh. Time to get some serious exercise.
4.14.2007
The Great Hair Dilemma
Last fall I got bored with my hair. I decided to let it grow out for a while and see what would happen. And so I stopped cutting, let it grow, and started brushing it forwards instead of backwards, which is something I previously hadn't done in years.
I was happy with the results for a while, but the longer my hair gets, the more it curls at the bottom. It's not quite afro-worthy, and I hope it stays that way. But it does get this little curly thing happening at the fringes that annoys me to no end because I think it looks ridiculous.
My "long" hair has been met with mixed opinions from others. I've been described as "scruffy looking" at least once or twice. At christmas my own grandmother didn't even recognize me. But I've also been told that it looks good on me, though I'm not sure I agree. I like the way it looks right after I get out of the shower and brush it, but once it's dry and curls a bit more I'm less impressed. I also have very very thick hair, which means that this 'doo is difficult to manage.
I guess the conclusion I've drawn is that I'm not 100% happy with the results of this experiment, and it's probably time for a haircut again. But now that I've made that decision, I can't bring myself to do it. It's rather silly. If I wanted the longer hair, I could grow it back, but part of me just doesn't want to cut it off.
I think I'm hoping that there's some way I can salvage this hair. Like, if I could have the longish hair just on top, but get rid of the curly stuff at the bottom, back, and sides. But that would end up leading to an undercut, and I hate undercuts.
I'm also hesitant to do this because there is little photographic history of this event. I've taken some bad web-cam pics, but otherwise there are very few photos of me with my longer hair. This phase in my history will be forgotten in time. I'm tempted to keep it longer and encourage people to take photos so that I can prove that for 6 months of my life I grew my hair out.
Of course, such an event in one's history is basically negligible. Who cares about a haircut anyways? And I probably wouldn't want those photos coming back to haunt me later in my life.
Well, I guess I'm off to the hair-dressers. Maybe they can do something neat with it. I'm doubtful, but we'll see what happens.
I was happy with the results for a while, but the longer my hair gets, the more it curls at the bottom. It's not quite afro-worthy, and I hope it stays that way. But it does get this little curly thing happening at the fringes that annoys me to no end because I think it looks ridiculous.
My "long" hair has been met with mixed opinions from others. I've been described as "scruffy looking" at least once or twice. At christmas my own grandmother didn't even recognize me. But I've also been told that it looks good on me, though I'm not sure I agree. I like the way it looks right after I get out of the shower and brush it, but once it's dry and curls a bit more I'm less impressed. I also have very very thick hair, which means that this 'doo is difficult to manage.
I guess the conclusion I've drawn is that I'm not 100% happy with the results of this experiment, and it's probably time for a haircut again. But now that I've made that decision, I can't bring myself to do it. It's rather silly. If I wanted the longer hair, I could grow it back, but part of me just doesn't want to cut it off.
I think I'm hoping that there's some way I can salvage this hair. Like, if I could have the longish hair just on top, but get rid of the curly stuff at the bottom, back, and sides. But that would end up leading to an undercut, and I hate undercuts.
I'm also hesitant to do this because there is little photographic history of this event. I've taken some bad web-cam pics, but otherwise there are very few photos of me with my longer hair. This phase in my history will be forgotten in time. I'm tempted to keep it longer and encourage people to take photos so that I can prove that for 6 months of my life I grew my hair out.
Of course, such an event in one's history is basically negligible. Who cares about a haircut anyways? And I probably wouldn't want those photos coming back to haunt me later in my life.
Well, I guess I'm off to the hair-dressers. Maybe they can do something neat with it. I'm doubtful, but we'll see what happens.
4.06.2007
It's Not Easy Being Green
I had to share this. I stumbled across it this morning while searching for info on the new NIN album Year Zero.
http://www.sadkermit.com
http://www.sadkermit.com
4.01.2007
I Was Not Prepared
I've had a bit of a crazy week, but in a good way. Today marked the first day in three days that I've spent any amount of time at home doing more than just sleeping. Wednesday was the Killswitch Engage show, Thursday I worked late, and Friday...
Well Friday is what this post is all about.
It all started around 5pm, when the staff at my company held a company milestone party. Beer, hors d'oeuvres, pizza, more beer, and tequila, all paid for by the company. We made merry until around 8:30pm, when the party relocated to another staff member's house. But I had other plans....
A little while back I purchased what is possibly the coolest and most ridiculous article of clothing I will ever own in my lifetime. Said clothing article is a very special t-shirt. This T-shirt, to be exact, aptly named the T-Qualizer.
I've had the shirt for about a month and been anxiously awaiting the right opportunity to wear it. Last night I finally got a chance to take it for a test-drive at the Buffalo Club, where Flood of Fire were playing a show.
Wearing an item like this out can be referred to as "peacocking", a term anybody who's read Neil Strauss' book "The Game" will recognize. It basically refers to wearing something attention grabbing in a public place with the sole purpose of being noticed.
Trust me. A guy wearing a t-shirt that blinks is pretty damn hard to miss. I knew the shirt would be a ton of fun and that friends would get a kick out of it. But I think I underestimated the amount of attention I would receive. But I guess it's hard to be subtle when your chest is lit up like a Las Vegas billboard.
During the course of the evening I must have been asked about the shirt roughly 50 times. This is no exaggeration. People wanted to stare at it, yell into the mic, find out where the batteries went, ask if it actually responded to sound (the answer is yes), ask find out where I got it, and even touch it. Later in the evening, the house band (after Flood of Fire's set) even asked me up on stage briefly to point out my totally awesome shirt to all the other bar patrons. (Pshhh.. As if they hadn't noticed it already.) Immediately after, two guys on the dance floor insisted on taking a picture with me, and followed that by offering me a discount at Best Buy, which is apparently where they work. (I have no intention of cashing in on that offer, but I found it amusing.)
At one point I actually had a group of girls beckoning to me to join them on the dance floor. It was as if the shirt screamed "I can do the robot like nobody's business!" I can't actually do the robot, but I suppose I have "some moves", if you can call them that. In any case, I passed them up since I was in the middle of a conversation with a friend. Sorry girls, maybe next time.
I'll admit, I'm usually a wall-fly at the bar. (No, not a barfly, since that implies spending all your time at, or next to, the bar itself). And towards the end of the night I was getting tired of answering the same questions over and over. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't like the attention.
Overall, the response to my shirt was excellent. I'll definitely be wearing this thing out again. But next time I think I'll work on my conversation skills a bit. Otherwise it will only be a matter of time before somebody figures out that the shirt is actually way cooler than me.
Fear me, for I am Nerdotron, and you will be T-qualized!
Well Friday is what this post is all about.
It all started around 5pm, when the staff at my company held a company milestone party. Beer, hors d'oeuvres, pizza, more beer, and tequila, all paid for by the company. We made merry until around 8:30pm, when the party relocated to another staff member's house. But I had other plans....
A little while back I purchased what is possibly the coolest and most ridiculous article of clothing I will ever own in my lifetime. Said clothing article is a very special t-shirt. This T-shirt, to be exact, aptly named the T-Qualizer.
I've had the shirt for about a month and been anxiously awaiting the right opportunity to wear it. Last night I finally got a chance to take it for a test-drive at the Buffalo Club, where Flood of Fire were playing a show.
Wearing an item like this out can be referred to as "peacocking", a term anybody who's read Neil Strauss' book "The Game" will recognize. It basically refers to wearing something attention grabbing in a public place with the sole purpose of being noticed.
Trust me. A guy wearing a t-shirt that blinks is pretty damn hard to miss. I knew the shirt would be a ton of fun and that friends would get a kick out of it. But I think I underestimated the amount of attention I would receive. But I guess it's hard to be subtle when your chest is lit up like a Las Vegas billboard.
During the course of the evening I must have been asked about the shirt roughly 50 times. This is no exaggeration. People wanted to stare at it, yell into the mic, find out where the batteries went, ask if it actually responded to sound (the answer is yes), ask find out where I got it, and even touch it. Later in the evening, the house band (after Flood of Fire's set) even asked me up on stage briefly to point out my totally awesome shirt to all the other bar patrons. (Pshhh.. As if they hadn't noticed it already.) Immediately after, two guys on the dance floor insisted on taking a picture with me, and followed that by offering me a discount at Best Buy, which is apparently where they work. (I have no intention of cashing in on that offer, but I found it amusing.)
At one point I actually had a group of girls beckoning to me to join them on the dance floor. It was as if the shirt screamed "I can do the robot like nobody's business!" I can't actually do the robot, but I suppose I have "some moves", if you can call them that. In any case, I passed them up since I was in the middle of a conversation with a friend. Sorry girls, maybe next time.
I'll admit, I'm usually a wall-fly at the bar. (No, not a barfly, since that implies spending all your time at, or next to, the bar itself). And towards the end of the night I was getting tired of answering the same questions over and over. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't like the attention.
Overall, the response to my shirt was excellent. I'll definitely be wearing this thing out again. But next time I think I'll work on my conversation skills a bit. Otherwise it will only be a matter of time before somebody figures out that the shirt is actually way cooler than me.
Fear me, for I am Nerdotron, and you will be T-qualized!
3.22.2007
If I Told You I'd Have to Kill You
I was conversing with one Mr. Alex Dodd today via the InterMcNetxxorz. We were discussing my new job position. Sort of. We couldn't really discuss much because, well, I'm not allowed.
There's a thing in the game industry called an NDA that prevents us from talking about the games we work on. For those that don't know, NDA stands for Non-Disclosure Agreement. When friends hear about this they all laugh and comment that they think all the secrecy is really funny. But the NDA exists for a few very good reasons.
The idea behind it is that we work in a very competitive entertainment industry. The powers that be don't want information leaked to their competition about what they're doing, so they require that everybody at the company keep their lips sealed. Because if the competition hears what you're doing, they're bound to try and outdo your company. That's how we make money.
I believe that, secondary to this, the NDA exists for reasons relating to corporate image. Information leaks have the potential to lead to bad press, and bad press is bad for company image.
You see, gamers are a very fickle crowd. One rumour or bad review spread around the internet too early in development of a game can spell doom for a project. Especially when working in QA (which is what I do), if word about possible technical issues got out into the public space, sales would certainly be affected. Nobody wants to buy a product that might be flawed. Sure that problem you read about is probably fixed long before the game hits the shelf, but the possibility alone could be enough to hurts sales.
And unfortunately in games you don't start making game with money you already have. Most companies are paid retroactively by a game publisher after they have recieved bits and pieces of the final product. By the end of a project, if we've done our jobs right, we've been paid for the project in full and it gets published. Any sales profits are usually used to recoup costs incurred during the development cycle. And of course the publisher takes their (larger) percentage. So any hit in sales is bad business for a game developer since your ROI is typically very low. If the game does poorly, the publisher won't front any money for another game, and suddenly you're out of business.
And so we have NDAs. It's just easier and safer not to tell anybody anything at all about what's going on behind studio doors.
But the general gaming community (and especially the hard-core elite) seem to hold a love-hate relationship with game developers. As long as the game is of high quality, they're happy. But if the developer makes a tiny single mistake and the gamers hear about it, molehills become mountains and the community comes marching with torches and pitchforks in hand. And just as they're about to burn the keep to ground, the peddler across the street yells "Wait! Look what I'm selling! Mine does what theirs does, but better, and without the problems you've heard about".
Let's face it: no game is ever perfect. Every single piece of software you ever buy in your lifetime will be full of troublesome technical issues. The question is simply whether or not you actually notice them enough that they change your perspective of the product, and subsequently about the company as a whole.
My job as a Quality Assurance Tester is to ensure that as many technical issues are found and fixed before the game is released to the public. And believe me, if you as a consumer of video games saw some of the things I get to see in the studios, you might never buy another video game again from those companies.
(And in some cases you might be better off not too, but that's a whole different ball of wax which is based on some biased personal opinion.)
So it's really better that I abide by the terms of my NDA. I don't keep secrets about my job for the sake of secrets, or to drive you crazy. Ultimately we as developers are keeping secrets for your benefit as a gamer.
(Well okay, that and if anybody found out I talked I'd probably lose my job.)
There's a thing in the game industry called an NDA that prevents us from talking about the games we work on. For those that don't know, NDA stands for Non-Disclosure Agreement. When friends hear about this they all laugh and comment that they think all the secrecy is really funny. But the NDA exists for a few very good reasons.
The idea behind it is that we work in a very competitive entertainment industry. The powers that be don't want information leaked to their competition about what they're doing, so they require that everybody at the company keep their lips sealed. Because if the competition hears what you're doing, they're bound to try and outdo your company. That's how we make money.
I believe that, secondary to this, the NDA exists for reasons relating to corporate image. Information leaks have the potential to lead to bad press, and bad press is bad for company image.
You see, gamers are a very fickle crowd. One rumour or bad review spread around the internet too early in development of a game can spell doom for a project. Especially when working in QA (which is what I do), if word about possible technical issues got out into the public space, sales would certainly be affected. Nobody wants to buy a product that might be flawed. Sure that problem you read about is probably fixed long before the game hits the shelf, but the possibility alone could be enough to hurts sales.
And unfortunately in games you don't start making game with money you already have. Most companies are paid retroactively by a game publisher after they have recieved bits and pieces of the final product. By the end of a project, if we've done our jobs right, we've been paid for the project in full and it gets published. Any sales profits are usually used to recoup costs incurred during the development cycle. And of course the publisher takes their (larger) percentage. So any hit in sales is bad business for a game developer since your ROI is typically very low. If the game does poorly, the publisher won't front any money for another game, and suddenly you're out of business.
And so we have NDAs. It's just easier and safer not to tell anybody anything at all about what's going on behind studio doors.
But the general gaming community (and especially the hard-core elite) seem to hold a love-hate relationship with game developers. As long as the game is of high quality, they're happy. But if the developer makes a tiny single mistake and the gamers hear about it, molehills become mountains and the community comes marching with torches and pitchforks in hand. And just as they're about to burn the keep to ground, the peddler across the street yells "Wait! Look what I'm selling! Mine does what theirs does, but better, and without the problems you've heard about".
Let's face it: no game is ever perfect. Every single piece of software you ever buy in your lifetime will be full of troublesome technical issues. The question is simply whether or not you actually notice them enough that they change your perspective of the product, and subsequently about the company as a whole.
My job as a Quality Assurance Tester is to ensure that as many technical issues are found and fixed before the game is released to the public. And believe me, if you as a consumer of video games saw some of the things I get to see in the studios, you might never buy another video game again from those companies.
(And in some cases you might be better off not too, but that's a whole different ball of wax which is based on some biased personal opinion.)
So it's really better that I abide by the terms of my NDA. I don't keep secrets about my job for the sake of secrets, or to drive you crazy. Ultimately we as developers are keeping secrets for your benefit as a gamer.
(Well okay, that and if anybody found out I talked I'd probably lose my job.)
3.14.2007
Scenes from the Hilltop
I spent this past weekend with 13 friends in a cabin at Hemlock Ski Resort. It was nice to get out of the city for a bit and relax.
Of course I use the term "cabin" loosely. It was really more of a rustic wilderness condo. The three-storey unit had a full kitchen with dishwasher, a television and dvd player, 2 bathrooms, laundry facilities, a pool table, a dart board, 2 fireplaces, and enough rooms and beds for all of us to sleep in.
We played games, drank, played more games, drank some more, and did our best to take advantage of the ski hill. Here are a few hilights:
Kyle brought along his Nintendo Wii and Scott provided an Xbox 360, which he "rented" from Futureshop. Both systems saw a lot of use. If you thought we'd go for an entire weekend without video games, you were sorely mistaken.
And even being miles away from home couldn't stop us from playing World of Warcraft, thanks to the trading card version of the game.
6 of us managed to venture outdoors to hit the hill, despite the miserable rainy weather.
This is one of the first things we saw as we were waiting for a few people to get their rental equipment. The guy in the middle is dangling from the chairlift, hanging on for dear life. In under a minute the scene was surrounded by lift attendants and first aid crew, who were powerless to do anything but stand below and watch. The guy had to kick his snowboard off with his free foot, and then drop about 30 feet to the ground. He was also precariously close to a ravine. Thankfully everything turned out fine.
We had no such issues. On his first run Scott ran down a skier with his snowboard after narrowly avoiding a group of small children taking lessons, but his board control improved significantly after that.
This sign greeted us at the top of the red chair. Does anybody wanna go down on the hookers? No? Oh come on guys, I really wanna ride the hookers. Aw, you're no fun.
We managed a few hours of skiing before retiring to the pub to hide from the rain. We had though about going back out, but the rain only got worse, and the cold chill had set in. Alcohol seemed the better option, so we gave up and went back to the cabin.
The rest of the evening basically involved board games, video games, a delicious dinner, and then copious amounts of alcohol. And even more games. And when K-Tizzle passed out over the back of the couch, still wearing her ski goggles and helmet, we knew that it had been a successful trip.
Of course I use the term "cabin" loosely. It was really more of a rustic wilderness condo. The three-storey unit had a full kitchen with dishwasher, a television and dvd player, 2 bathrooms, laundry facilities, a pool table, a dart board, 2 fireplaces, and enough rooms and beds for all of us to sleep in.
We played games, drank, played more games, drank some more, and did our best to take advantage of the ski hill. Here are a few hilights:
Kyle brought along his Nintendo Wii and Scott provided an Xbox 360, which he "rented" from Futureshop. Both systems saw a lot of use. If you thought we'd go for an entire weekend without video games, you were sorely mistaken.
And even being miles away from home couldn't stop us from playing World of Warcraft, thanks to the trading card version of the game.
6 of us managed to venture outdoors to hit the hill, despite the miserable rainy weather.
This is one of the first things we saw as we were waiting for a few people to get their rental equipment. The guy in the middle is dangling from the chairlift, hanging on for dear life. In under a minute the scene was surrounded by lift attendants and first aid crew, who were powerless to do anything but stand below and watch. The guy had to kick his snowboard off with his free foot, and then drop about 30 feet to the ground. He was also precariously close to a ravine. Thankfully everything turned out fine.
We had no such issues. On his first run Scott ran down a skier with his snowboard after narrowly avoiding a group of small children taking lessons, but his board control improved significantly after that.
This sign greeted us at the top of the red chair. Does anybody wanna go down on the hookers? No? Oh come on guys, I really wanna ride the hookers. Aw, you're no fun.
We managed a few hours of skiing before retiring to the pub to hide from the rain. We had though about going back out, but the rain only got worse, and the cold chill had set in. Alcohol seemed the better option, so we gave up and went back to the cabin.
The rest of the evening basically involved board games, video games, a delicious dinner, and then copious amounts of alcohol. And even more games. And when K-Tizzle passed out over the back of the couch, still wearing her ski goggles and helmet, we knew that it had been a successful trip.
3.08.2007
Things That Go with "Bake"
A strange but pointless thought for the day. It came to me while eating some poutine in the food court.
[Blank] 'n Bake: A List of Definitions
1.) Shake 'n Bake:
A popular meal fixing, shake 'n bake is a method of cooking in which raw meat or vegetables are placed in a plastic bag full of bread crumbs or other appropriate breading. The bag is shaken vigorously so the food becomes coated in the breading, after which it is baked in the oven. shake 'n bake chicken is probably the most popular form.
2.) Fake 'n Bake:
A method of personal tanning, without the actual tanning part. A person applies a special tanning lotion to their body, and within minutes they develop an artificial tan. The skin takes on a darker tone, but no pesky tanning beds or sunlight are required.
3.) Take 'n Bake:
Unlike delivery pizza, take 'n bake pizza is prepared and purchased at a pizzeria, deli or grocery store, but must be baked at home in a conventional oven.
4.) Wake 'n Bake:
The act of waking in the morning and "smoking a joint" before, or in place of, breakfast.
Can you think of others? Comment them below.
[Blank] 'n Bake: A List of Definitions
1.) Shake 'n Bake:
A popular meal fixing, shake 'n bake is a method of cooking in which raw meat or vegetables are placed in a plastic bag full of bread crumbs or other appropriate breading. The bag is shaken vigorously so the food becomes coated in the breading, after which it is baked in the oven. shake 'n bake chicken is probably the most popular form.
2.) Fake 'n Bake:
A method of personal tanning, without the actual tanning part. A person applies a special tanning lotion to their body, and within minutes they develop an artificial tan. The skin takes on a darker tone, but no pesky tanning beds or sunlight are required.
3.) Take 'n Bake:
Unlike delivery pizza, take 'n bake pizza is prepared and purchased at a pizzeria, deli or grocery store, but must be baked at home in a conventional oven.
4.) Wake 'n Bake:
The act of waking in the morning and "smoking a joint" before, or in place of, breakfast.
Can you think of others? Comment them below.
3.04.2007
High as a Freakin' Tree
You probably can't make this image out very well, as it was taken using digital zoom on a cell phone camera at night. So I'll just tell you what it is.
It's a syringe embedded in the trunk of a tree. It was near the corner of Hastings and Carral, just outside the Blarney Stone Pub. Nobody planted it there for the sake of this photo. It was there before we arrived. We just happened to notice it while standing in line for the 1.5 hours it took us to get inside.
This is a true piece of downtown Vancouver culture right here, captured for posterity.
For the record, the Blarney Stone is a rather reputable pub and the syringe should be not be used as an accurate indicator of the type of establishment being run there. Despite the somewhat sketchy locale, the Blarney Stone is actually a pretty nice place. At least as far as faux-iris pubs go, anyway.
2.26.2007
Does Anybody Have a Patch for Women?
I've been thinking a lot lately. Not having a job tends to afford me a lot of time to do that. I've been thinking about games and life. I think on some level I could probably relate any facet of my life to a game. It's true that being a gamer isn't just a hobby; It's a way of life.
I've also been pondering why it is that, in general, gamers have a hard time meeting women. And here's what I've come up with.
(This is meant to be humorous. Don't take any of it too seriously. I actually think women are wonderful.)
Women, like everything else, are like playing a game. Except in the case of women it's a poorly designed game that is very difficult to play.
First off, the images on the packaging never seem to properly communicate the actual content. It seems a lot of time and money can be spent making the box look pretty. But that doesn't every necessarily mean that you'll enjoy what you get once you get that box open. There's really now way to tell for sure what this person is like, so the only way you're going to find out is to install her into your life and find out first-hand. You just can't use the box art as an accurate judge.
Second, women don't come with a manual. Whoever made this product didn't even bother telling us gamers how to use it. Granted most of the time we wouldn't read the manual anyway, but it would be nice to have one to refer to sometimes. Especially when a problem is encountered that requires some troubleshooting. When the red lights start blinking and alarms start sounding it would be nice to have a guide telling us how to interpret those warning dialogues and properly diffuse the situation.
Thirdly, women are terrible from a gameplay perspective. The rules aren't clearly defined and are changing constantly. The controls are unfriendly and difficult to master. Mission goals are cloaked in a complex and sometimes daunting series of puzzles. Helpful user feedback or guidance are seldom provided, leaving the gamer confused and frustrated and uninterested in playing. In some cases there is also a heavy time commitment that just doesn't cater to casual play.
There are also major technical hurdles with women. There's no way to remap major functions into a more workable solution. Hacking the .ini files is out of the question, as they are most definitely "read only" when it comes to women, and only the woman has the the correct privileges to change that. Installation is difficult at best. If successful, removal and uninstallation is an even messier process. They're hard to get rid of, and often leave traces of themselves behind while wreaking havoc on your memory. It's nearly impossible to get a woman to behave and perform exactly the way you expect, not too mention that female software is full of all sorts of technical flaws and a patch never seems to be available.
Don't even get me started on the lack of multiplayer support...
Of course, if you can miraculously get past all that, the results can be absolutely amazing and totally worth all the trouble. Women are also far superior to games in that they have built-in support for haptic feedback. Games rarely have that, and if they do it requires some phenomenally expensive hardware.
My action plan is this:
I'm going to get a job designing games. I'm going to make some great games and build on that experience. And then I'm going to apply that knowledge, but not to meet women.
Instead, I'm just going to design a better woman, dammit.
(ugh. Weird Science flashback.)
I've also been pondering why it is that, in general, gamers have a hard time meeting women. And here's what I've come up with.
(This is meant to be humorous. Don't take any of it too seriously. I actually think women are wonderful.)
Women, like everything else, are like playing a game. Except in the case of women it's a poorly designed game that is very difficult to play.
First off, the images on the packaging never seem to properly communicate the actual content. It seems a lot of time and money can be spent making the box look pretty. But that doesn't every necessarily mean that you'll enjoy what you get once you get that box open. There's really now way to tell for sure what this person is like, so the only way you're going to find out is to install her into your life and find out first-hand. You just can't use the box art as an accurate judge.
Second, women don't come with a manual. Whoever made this product didn't even bother telling us gamers how to use it. Granted most of the time we wouldn't read the manual anyway, but it would be nice to have one to refer to sometimes. Especially when a problem is encountered that requires some troubleshooting. When the red lights start blinking and alarms start sounding it would be nice to have a guide telling us how to interpret those warning dialogues and properly diffuse the situation.
Thirdly, women are terrible from a gameplay perspective. The rules aren't clearly defined and are changing constantly. The controls are unfriendly and difficult to master. Mission goals are cloaked in a complex and sometimes daunting series of puzzles. Helpful user feedback or guidance are seldom provided, leaving the gamer confused and frustrated and uninterested in playing. In some cases there is also a heavy time commitment that just doesn't cater to casual play.
There are also major technical hurdles with women. There's no way to remap major functions into a more workable solution. Hacking the .ini files is out of the question, as they are most definitely "read only" when it comes to women, and only the woman has the the correct privileges to change that. Installation is difficult at best. If successful, removal and uninstallation is an even messier process. They're hard to get rid of, and often leave traces of themselves behind while wreaking havoc on your memory. It's nearly impossible to get a woman to behave and perform exactly the way you expect, not too mention that female software is full of all sorts of technical flaws and a patch never seems to be available.
Don't even get me started on the lack of multiplayer support...
Of course, if you can miraculously get past all that, the results can be absolutely amazing and totally worth all the trouble. Women are also far superior to games in that they have built-in support for haptic feedback. Games rarely have that, and if they do it requires some phenomenally expensive hardware.
My action plan is this:
I'm going to get a job designing games. I'm going to make some great games and build on that experience. And then I'm going to apply that knowledge, but not to meet women.
Instead, I'm just going to design a better woman, dammit.
(ugh. Weird Science flashback.)
2.25.2007
Pirate Funk Was a Sunken Ship
Nothing interesting to report. The pirate funk party was probably fun. I wouldn't know since I didn't go. Everybody bailed out at the last minute. Instead I spent the evening with a friend eating snack foods while watching Say Anything starring John Cusack. It wasn't nearly as funky or booty-filled (pirate booty, of course) as the night had originally promised. It was an enjoyable albeit quiet evening nonetheless.
2.21.2007
Trent Reznor is Insane!
I take it back. If you read the comments for the post below, you no doubt saw Sarah's comment about the phone number. I replied that it has nothing to do with the forthcoming album.
But then I googled the phone number and did some research. Low and behold, it does in fact relate to the new album. The new NIN album is a concept album based in the year 2022. And it seems Trent Reznor has orchestrated a complicated viral marketing campaign to promote this concept album. The campaign includes a variety of hints and clues hidden in t-shirts and on websites. The websites themselves seem to represent the fiction that is the basis for this new album.
There's a pretty explanation of what's been going on at the blog I've linked below. It also provides links to all the little bits and pieces so that you can get sucked in to the mystery, if that sort of thing suits you.
Click here for the blog post
Enjoy.
But then I googled the phone number and did some research. Low and behold, it does in fact relate to the new album. The new NIN album is a concept album based in the year 2022. And it seems Trent Reznor has orchestrated a complicated viral marketing campaign to promote this concept album. The campaign includes a variety of hints and clues hidden in t-shirts and on websites. The websites themselves seem to represent the fiction that is the basis for this new album.
There's a pretty explanation of what's been going on at the blog I've linked below. It also provides links to all the little bits and pieces so that you can get sucked in to the mystery, if that sort of thing suits you.
Click here for the blog post
Enjoy.
2.19.2007
One More Thing
I almost forgot! Nine Inch Nails has released two new tracks from the upcoming album Year Zero for preview on their myspace.
If you're a fan check them out here.
I especially like My Violet Heart.
I can't wait for the full release of this album. I hate to sound like one of "those people", but everything Trent Reznor touches turns to gold. Okay fine, I admit it. I basically am one of "those people". Except that in no way do I feel that somehow his music magically saved my screwed up life. My life was never really screwed up. I've had it pretty good. I just really like NIN.
Off topic. Back to the point. New NIN album coming out. New songs to listen to. HOORAY!
If you're a fan check them out here.
I especially like My Violet Heart.
I can't wait for the full release of this album. I hate to sound like one of "those people", but everything Trent Reznor touches turns to gold. Okay fine, I admit it. I basically am one of "those people". Except that in no way do I feel that somehow his music magically saved my screwed up life. My life was never really screwed up. I've had it pretty good. I just really like NIN.
Off topic. Back to the point. New NIN album coming out. New songs to listen to. HOORAY!
1:00 am, Sunday Night. All is Quiet
Well, quiet except for the sound of me typing while my mp3 collection continues to shuffle along in the background. There's also the low rumbling of music coming from through my bedroom wall. My roommate falls asleep to music.
The weekend was, well, a pretty average weekend. The positive news on Friday about my upcoming job started it off pretty well. Friday evening I found myself ushered out of the house to get a Thai meal and see a movie with Scott and Rachel, so that the other roommate could have some alone time with his fiancee. We watched Hannibal Rising. I quite enjoyed it. I'm not sure Rachel can say the same. Never take a vegetarian who hates horrors to see a movie about a cannibalistic sociopath. Oops.
Following the movie, I headed downtown to catch a Flood of Fire show. I had a few celebratory drinks and visited with the guys. Did I mention I'm a bit of a groupie? I forgot my earplugs and so my ears suffered a little bit, but the ringing has mostly gone away now. I'll remember them next time.
Saturday was a short and uneventful trip to the mall, followed by some video games. I decided to put green spiker-gel in my hair for the hell of it. It feels a bit like putting in a thin layer or acrylic paint, but it looks neat. There had also been plans involving some friends and alcohol, but that didn't pan out due to poor planning and a slight case of laziness on the part of all parties involved. Poor Alison was most disappointed. Next time I think I'll just take some initiative instead of leaving the planning to others.
Instead a few of us watched Running with Scissors. I hated it. Have any of you seen this movie, or maybe The Squid and the Whale? They're rather similar. They're both these ultra-sophisticated high-drama contemporary period pieces (70's and 80's respectively). And they both claim they're "comedies". I'll admit that both movies have their moments, but they're NOT comedies. There's nothing funny about a bunch of messed up miserable people who are ruining each others' lives. Jason told me it would be "dry humor". This wasn't dry humor. It wasn't even humor. It was just three hours of "dry" interspersed here and there with snippets of slight amusement. But I digress...
I spent the better part of today with Scott, Kyle, and Jeff. Sushi, a comic store, watching Metalocalypse, some TV, and finally having some pizza. 8 hours later I returned home. It was nice to get out of the house. And now I'm sitting at home writing a blog post.
I'm also reading a lot of Questionable Content. (Don't worry, it's entirely safe and not in any way inappropriate). It's an excellent web comic. One of the best I've read by far. Thanks to Sarah from E-town for mentioning it on her blog a while back. I checked it out, and liked it so much that I've been sharing it with all my net-savvy friends.
I'll hear more details about my job tomorrow or Tuesday. Any news is good news, but if they're able to offer me what they were trying to offer, I'll be ecstatic.
I'm looking forward to Friday as well. There's a funk band hosting a pirate-themed party. Costume is expected, but I'm going to put a personal twist on it. I'm thinking a sunglasses eyepatch and a jacket adorned with floppy disks. Maybe I'll post some pics next week, if I remember my camera.
Enjoy your evenings (or, rather, early mornings in this case) ladies and gents. Tomorrow (today?) is the beginning of a new week of possibility.
The weekend was, well, a pretty average weekend. The positive news on Friday about my upcoming job started it off pretty well. Friday evening I found myself ushered out of the house to get a Thai meal and see a movie with Scott and Rachel, so that the other roommate could have some alone time with his fiancee. We watched Hannibal Rising. I quite enjoyed it. I'm not sure Rachel can say the same. Never take a vegetarian who hates horrors to see a movie about a cannibalistic sociopath. Oops.
Following the movie, I headed downtown to catch a Flood of Fire show. I had a few celebratory drinks and visited with the guys. Did I mention I'm a bit of a groupie? I forgot my earplugs and so my ears suffered a little bit, but the ringing has mostly gone away now. I'll remember them next time.
Saturday was a short and uneventful trip to the mall, followed by some video games. I decided to put green spiker-gel in my hair for the hell of it. It feels a bit like putting in a thin layer or acrylic paint, but it looks neat. There had also been plans involving some friends and alcohol, but that didn't pan out due to poor planning and a slight case of laziness on the part of all parties involved. Poor Alison was most disappointed. Next time I think I'll just take some initiative instead of leaving the planning to others.
Instead a few of us watched Running with Scissors. I hated it. Have any of you seen this movie, or maybe The Squid and the Whale? They're rather similar. They're both these ultra-sophisticated high-drama contemporary period pieces (70's and 80's respectively). And they both claim they're "comedies". I'll admit that both movies have their moments, but they're NOT comedies. There's nothing funny about a bunch of messed up miserable people who are ruining each others' lives. Jason told me it would be "dry humor". This wasn't dry humor. It wasn't even humor. It was just three hours of "dry" interspersed here and there with snippets of slight amusement. But I digress...
I spent the better part of today with Scott, Kyle, and Jeff. Sushi, a comic store, watching Metalocalypse, some TV, and finally having some pizza. 8 hours later I returned home. It was nice to get out of the house. And now I'm sitting at home writing a blog post.
I'm also reading a lot of Questionable Content. (Don't worry, it's entirely safe and not in any way inappropriate). It's an excellent web comic. One of the best I've read by far. Thanks to Sarah from E-town for mentioning it on her blog a while back. I checked it out, and liked it so much that I've been sharing it with all my net-savvy friends.
I'll hear more details about my job tomorrow or Tuesday. Any news is good news, but if they're able to offer me what they were trying to offer, I'll be ecstatic.
I'm looking forward to Friday as well. There's a funk band hosting a pirate-themed party. Costume is expected, but I'm going to put a personal twist on it. I'm thinking a sunglasses eyepatch and a jacket adorned with floppy disks. Maybe I'll post some pics next week, if I remember my camera.
Enjoy your evenings (or, rather, early mornings in this case) ladies and gents. Tomorrow (today?) is the beginning of a new week of possibility.
2.16.2007
One of Those Mornings
I hit the snooze alarm only once this morning, giving myself a few extra minutes of rest before dragging myself out of bed at 8:09am this morning. I hadn't been up that early in months. I'd had trouble getting to sleep the night before, and I could feel the drowsiness beginning to set in.
I had a job interview at a game company this morning. It was my second interview there, and I wanted to make a good impression. So I made sure to prep the coffee maker last night and have it ready to go.
I had a shower, shaved, got dressed, checked my e-mail, and mentally prepared myself. But the moment I left the house, things started to go awry.
Riding a caffeine high, I sauntered to the bus stop at 8:55 in anticipation of my bus at 9:08. The 9:08 bus didn't arrive, leaving me to wait for the 9:23 bus and setting me a full 15 minutes behind. It's a good thing I had planned to try and catch an earlier bus, just in case this sort of thing happened. Things got worse though, as the bus hit a construction zone which slowed traffic and put me another 5 minutes behind schedule.
I checked my watch as I got onto the skytrain. It was only 9:35, so I was still making okay time. I figured I'd probably be about 5 minutes late for my meeting. I also know that game companies are petty relaxed environments, so I didn't worry much about it. There's no point stressing over something I have no control over. So I arrived at their office at 10:05am, as expected, and I don't think anybody noticed my tardiness.
I greeted Mark Baxter, the interviewer and a former instructor of mine, with a "Good morning."
"Good morning. It's been a while," he said, and I smiled back.
"It sure has."
Mark lead me down a hallway to a room dubbed "the fishtank".
"We'll do the interview in there," he said. "Please have a seat. I'll be back in a moment, I just need to fetch somebody else." I thanked him and turned for the doorway.
It was at the very moment that I walked, face-first, directly into a glass wall.
F#$k. For a split second I understood how it feels to be a starling at my parents' house in the spring.
Luckily I don't think anybody noticed, including Mark. I'm the kind of person who will laugh these sorts of things off, and so I did just that, shrugged, and had a seat on the couch.
The interview went very well. I treated myself to a tall caramel macchiato on the way home. I've got a good feeling about this one.
Honestly though, who walks into a glass wall? Next time I'm making stronger coffee.
I had a job interview at a game company this morning. It was my second interview there, and I wanted to make a good impression. So I made sure to prep the coffee maker last night and have it ready to go.
I had a shower, shaved, got dressed, checked my e-mail, and mentally prepared myself. But the moment I left the house, things started to go awry.
Riding a caffeine high, I sauntered to the bus stop at 8:55 in anticipation of my bus at 9:08. The 9:08 bus didn't arrive, leaving me to wait for the 9:23 bus and setting me a full 15 minutes behind. It's a good thing I had planned to try and catch an earlier bus, just in case this sort of thing happened. Things got worse though, as the bus hit a construction zone which slowed traffic and put me another 5 minutes behind schedule.
I checked my watch as I got onto the skytrain. It was only 9:35, so I was still making okay time. I figured I'd probably be about 5 minutes late for my meeting. I also know that game companies are petty relaxed environments, so I didn't worry much about it. There's no point stressing over something I have no control over. So I arrived at their office at 10:05am, as expected, and I don't think anybody noticed my tardiness.
I greeted Mark Baxter, the interviewer and a former instructor of mine, with a "Good morning."
"Good morning. It's been a while," he said, and I smiled back.
"It sure has."
Mark lead me down a hallway to a room dubbed "the fishtank".
"We'll do the interview in there," he said. "Please have a seat. I'll be back in a moment, I just need to fetch somebody else." I thanked him and turned for the doorway.
It was at the very moment that I walked, face-first, directly into a glass wall.
F#$k. For a split second I understood how it feels to be a starling at my parents' house in the spring.
Luckily I don't think anybody noticed, including Mark. I'm the kind of person who will laugh these sorts of things off, and so I did just that, shrugged, and had a seat on the couch.
The interview went very well. I treated myself to a tall caramel macchiato on the way home. I've got a good feeling about this one.
Honestly though, who walks into a glass wall? Next time I'm making stronger coffee.
2.14.2007
The day that shall not be named in my presence
So here's why I hate Valentines day. And no, it's not because I think it's a holiday invented by greeting card companies to drive mass consumerism and help the slow decay of civilization. I hate V-day because it's a day that caters exclusively to couples, and leaves single guys like me in the dust. I'm single, it's February 14th, and I'm homocidally jealous of everybody who's got a special somebody.
I want to try and convince myself that it's just another day unlike any other, but that's pretty hard to do when everybody else you know who's in a relationship is "getting it on" at least once in the 24 hour period known as Valentines Day.
The day has been otherwise referred to by some friends of mine as "hump day", which sounds pretty accurate to me. I also had one friend, during a discussion of how the holiday is even unfair to men in a relationship, suggest that Feb. 15th makes up for that, as it has been unoffically dubbed "steak and a blow-job day".
But where does that leave me, and guys like me? The only way I'll get that is if I go to the keg, buy my own steak, and miraculously convince the waitress to meet me in the men's room during her break.
I delved into some Valentine's Day history to see if I could come up with some gem of knowledge that would make me feel better about the day. You know what I found out? The holiday really IS a day made for couples! Even history failed me.
It originated around 270AD in the Roman Empire. St. Valentine was a bishop who was known for marrying couples in secrecy after the emperor had forbidden marriages.
The part of this story I like is that he was later martyred for his apparent treachery to the emperor and the state. That's right folks: he made couples happy, and he got executed for it. If I were in a relationship I would probably feel a bit better about this whole stupid day, and would probably feel bad for St. Valentine. But since I'm single, I've gotta side with Emperor Claudius II on this one.
I was going to plan some sort of mass armaggeddon as a personal protest celebration. But it turns out mass armageddons require a lot of time, money, resources, and planning. So with such short notice, I guess I'll just have to do what many single women out there are probably doing tonight: curl up on the couch with some ice cream, watch a sappy movie, and cry myself to sleep.
You all suck. Enjoy your stupid Valentine's Day.
I want to try and convince myself that it's just another day unlike any other, but that's pretty hard to do when everybody else you know who's in a relationship is "getting it on" at least once in the 24 hour period known as Valentines Day.
The day has been otherwise referred to by some friends of mine as "hump day", which sounds pretty accurate to me. I also had one friend, during a discussion of how the holiday is even unfair to men in a relationship, suggest that Feb. 15th makes up for that, as it has been unoffically dubbed "steak and a blow-job day".
But where does that leave me, and guys like me? The only way I'll get that is if I go to the keg, buy my own steak, and miraculously convince the waitress to meet me in the men's room during her break.
I delved into some Valentine's Day history to see if I could come up with some gem of knowledge that would make me feel better about the day. You know what I found out? The holiday really IS a day made for couples! Even history failed me.
It originated around 270AD in the Roman Empire. St. Valentine was a bishop who was known for marrying couples in secrecy after the emperor had forbidden marriages.
The part of this story I like is that he was later martyred for his apparent treachery to the emperor and the state. That's right folks: he made couples happy, and he got executed for it. If I were in a relationship I would probably feel a bit better about this whole stupid day, and would probably feel bad for St. Valentine. But since I'm single, I've gotta side with Emperor Claudius II on this one.
I was going to plan some sort of mass armaggeddon as a personal protest celebration. But it turns out mass armageddons require a lot of time, money, resources, and planning. So with such short notice, I guess I'll just have to do what many single women out there are probably doing tonight: curl up on the couch with some ice cream, watch a sappy movie, and cry myself to sleep.
You all suck. Enjoy your stupid Valentine's Day.
(Parental Disclaimer: no Mom and Dad, don't worry, your son isn't actually this shallow.)
2.11.2007
A Little Four-Player Fun
I'm going to pose a question. I'm sure it's a question that's crossed all your minds at one point or another. I think it's a reasonably poignant question that deserves much thought and consideration. It's a question that I think is fully representative of our subconcious collective social conscience.
If two guys and two girls are having a 4-way and half way through the two girls start going at it with each other, what are the two guys to do? Do they just stand there and self-service in front of each other, or should they pair up too?
If two guys and two girls are having a 4-way and half way through the two girls start going at it with each other, what are the two guys to do? Do they just stand there and self-service in front of each other, or should they pair up too?
2.05.2007
My Brain Needs Reformatting
A lot of people have been asking a particular question of me a lot lately. Every time I give an answer. I've been asked many times and I've given many different answers. And anybody on the recieving end of those answers knows as well as I do that they are over-rationalized excuses.
That's all they are excuses. They're not real answers.
I've been toying with this same question myself for quite some time. I won't say how long, so suffice it to say that it's a two digit number and the units of measurement are longer than minutes.
The advice everybody has been giving me is (mostly) right. It's good advice. I understand what everybody is saying, and it only makes perfect sense.
So why then, do I refuse to take that advice?
The only answer I have is that at present I do not feel I am properly emotionally equipped.
That's my answer. And for now it's the only real answer I'll give.
That's all they are excuses. They're not real answers.
I've been toying with this same question myself for quite some time. I won't say how long, so suffice it to say that it's a two digit number and the units of measurement are longer than minutes.
The advice everybody has been giving me is (mostly) right. It's good advice. I understand what everybody is saying, and it only makes perfect sense.
So why then, do I refuse to take that advice?
The only answer I have is that at present I do not feel I am properly emotionally equipped.
That's my answer. And for now it's the only real answer I'll give.
1.31.2007
Runs in the family...
My sister just made an interesting post in which she draws attention to a "grey area" that surrounds any issue.
Anybody who knows me will know that, like my sister, I tend to gravitate to that same "grey area". I'm not argumentative; I usually end up coming off as stubborn, or people misunderstand my motives. And often I'm simply accused of being indecisive or unopinionated, which isn't the case at all.
In any case, go here and read the post. Most especially, the second(ish) paragraph about spin doctors, english class, and bullshitting.
My sister and I may be two very different people, but we're also very alike. We come from the same blood, after all. And we have the same oddball parents.
No news on the job front yet. Though I am noticing a disturbing trend with companies: they like to tell you they'll call on a certain day at a certain time for a certain reason, and then string you along for days or even weeks and make you sit around waiting for a phone call that isn't coming. I have a life too, Corporate World. I have better things to do than wait for you to call me. If you say you'll call, do it. Frankly, I'm finding this behaviour very unprofessional on the part of those guilty parties.
Anybody who knows me will know that, like my sister, I tend to gravitate to that same "grey area". I'm not argumentative; I usually end up coming off as stubborn, or people misunderstand my motives. And often I'm simply accused of being indecisive or unopinionated, which isn't the case at all.
In any case, go here and read the post. Most especially, the second(ish) paragraph about spin doctors, english class, and bullshitting.
My sister and I may be two very different people, but we're also very alike. We come from the same blood, after all. And we have the same oddball parents.
No news on the job front yet. Though I am noticing a disturbing trend with companies: they like to tell you they'll call on a certain day at a certain time for a certain reason, and then string you along for days or even weeks and make you sit around waiting for a phone call that isn't coming. I have a life too, Corporate World. I have better things to do than wait for you to call me. If you say you'll call, do it. Frankly, I'm finding this behaviour very unprofessional on the part of those guilty parties.
1.25.2007
Panhandler in Training
Well dammitall. I'm beside myself with shock. Stupid karma...
Once upon a time I worked at a call center doing tech support for a high profile computer company. It was an okay job and good experience, but in the end it didn't make me happy and so I quit. And I swore never ever to work at a call center again.
So I've been looking for work for the last 4 months. It's getting to the point where I desperately need a job and I'm starting to consider applying for things that I previously thought I would never consider doing.
Last week I applied for a job at Telus. They've been hiring for their Telus mobility call center lately. And while it churned my stomache to imagine working in a call center again, the prospect of earning $18.55/hour was very promising. And they way I had things figured, between my previous call center experience and my previous cell phone sales experience, they would be foolish not to hire me.
On Monday I was called in to complete a "skills assessment test". Which didn't really assess skills at all. There were a few logic problems, but mostly it was a test to profile your personality and determine how you would handle a customer service position. It basically simulated phone calls, offered multiple responses to the simulated customer, and asked you to rate those responses good, moderate, or poor. I didn't find it all that difficult as it was basically like doing what I used to do at my old tech support job.
We were told that we'd hear within a week if we had been selected for an interview.
I have just found out that I have been passed up. I won't even be getting an interview. On the bright side, it means that I can stick to my vow to never work in a call center again.
F#$k you, Karma. F#$k you.
I have 6 to 8 weeks left on EI, and no job prospects. I'm running out of time, money, and options, all at the same time. I'm royally f#$ked. I honestly don't know what to do.
I guess somewhere along the line the world decided that despite all my effort and hard work at being me these past 26 years, I'm just not good enough at that. I want to curl up and die.
(But don't worry, I won't. That would be foolish.)
Once upon a time I worked at a call center doing tech support for a high profile computer company. It was an okay job and good experience, but in the end it didn't make me happy and so I quit. And I swore never ever to work at a call center again.
So I've been looking for work for the last 4 months. It's getting to the point where I desperately need a job and I'm starting to consider applying for things that I previously thought I would never consider doing.
Last week I applied for a job at Telus. They've been hiring for their Telus mobility call center lately. And while it churned my stomache to imagine working in a call center again, the prospect of earning $18.55/hour was very promising. And they way I had things figured, between my previous call center experience and my previous cell phone sales experience, they would be foolish not to hire me.
On Monday I was called in to complete a "skills assessment test". Which didn't really assess skills at all. There were a few logic problems, but mostly it was a test to profile your personality and determine how you would handle a customer service position. It basically simulated phone calls, offered multiple responses to the simulated customer, and asked you to rate those responses good, moderate, or poor. I didn't find it all that difficult as it was basically like doing what I used to do at my old tech support job.
We were told that we'd hear within a week if we had been selected for an interview.
I have just found out that I have been passed up. I won't even be getting an interview. On the bright side, it means that I can stick to my vow to never work in a call center again.
F#$k you, Karma. F#$k you.
I have 6 to 8 weeks left on EI, and no job prospects. I'm running out of time, money, and options, all at the same time. I'm royally f#$ked. I honestly don't know what to do.
I guess somewhere along the line the world decided that despite all my effort and hard work at being me these past 26 years, I'm just not good enough at that. I want to curl up and die.
(But don't worry, I won't. That would be foolish.)
1.18.2007
Now accepting applications
While avoiding doing anything constructive today, I stumbled across this article, which draws attention to the fact that geeks are clearly better dating material.
Ladies, if you're still after the bad-boy type, give this article a read.
(har har. Right, there are no ladies reading this except maybe my sister)
Which leaves me asking, why the heck am I still single?
(I already know the answer. It's mostly a rhetorical question.)
I am now accepting applications for prospective dates. Please send your name, age, physical dimensions, interests and hobbies, and an answer the following question: Do you prefer chocolate or ice cream?
In the meantime, I'm going to go get a tattoo and stock up on leather jackets and cigarettes, just in case this geek-chic trend doesn't last.
Ladies, if you're still after the bad-boy type, give this article a read.
(har har. Right, there are no ladies reading this except maybe my sister)
Which leaves me asking, why the heck am I still single?
(I already know the answer. It's mostly a rhetorical question.)
I am now accepting applications for prospective dates. Please send your name, age, physical dimensions, interests and hobbies, and an answer the following question: Do you prefer chocolate or ice cream?
In the meantime, I'm going to go get a tattoo and stock up on leather jackets and cigarettes, just in case this geek-chic trend doesn't last.
1.17.2007
Trading one addiction for another.
So as any knowledgeable 'gamer' knows, the World of Warcraft: Burning Crusade expansion was released yesterday. All my friends, or at least those that play WarCrack, as it is affectionately called, rushed out to get their copies. I suspect I won't be seeing of hearing from a few of them for some time.
My roommates are both among them. But of course, I live with them, so I'll be seeing them rather frequently. I just won't be able to have conversations with them unless I log in to Azeroth or prefix anything I try to say to them with a '/tell'.
Last fall they encouraged me to join in the addicting fun that is Warcraft. I finally broke down. And for a few months I quite enjoyed it. But after about 6 weeks I found the entertainment value growing somewhat stagnant. I was starting to lose interest. And nobody wants to pay $20/month for a game they're not playing, so I cancelled my account.
So now that BC is out, I'm being tempted again. I've resolved not to give in. (Okay, well at least not until after I finish a few other games on my list).
So I went to the comic store today to pick up a few things. I had an urge to splurge. I wanted to spoil myself with something new and fun and exciting. Sandman volume 5 was all sold out, to my dismay. I was really looking forward to reading that.
Instead, I bought 2 of these.
It's not quite the same as the online version, but I figured it would be a little more social, possibly more entertaining, and not nearly as costly as that $20/month subscription fee.
Clever Blizzard. They've designed it in just such a way that, like any other CCG I've ever played, you basically have to buy more cards. The game requires a 60 card deck. The clever bastards give you a 30 card starter and two 15 card boosters, which means that right from the get-go you don't even have a full 60 card deck, since you won't be able to use the majority of the booster contents in your 30 card preconstructed deck. Nevermind the fact that the hero classes in the pre-con. decks aren't labelled on the box, so there's now way of knowing what kind of deck you're purchasing until it's too late. What if I don't wanna play a Night-Elf Druid, huh? What about that?
Maybe I should just reactivate my WoW account and log back in... *sigh*
( In all honestly though, I'm really looking forward to trying this game out. It's been a while since I've played a good CCG. I kinda miss them. Just a little. )
My roommates are both among them. But of course, I live with them, so I'll be seeing them rather frequently. I just won't be able to have conversations with them unless I log in to Azeroth or prefix anything I try to say to them with a '/tell'.
Last fall they encouraged me to join in the addicting fun that is Warcraft. I finally broke down. And for a few months I quite enjoyed it. But after about 6 weeks I found the entertainment value growing somewhat stagnant. I was starting to lose interest. And nobody wants to pay $20/month for a game they're not playing, so I cancelled my account.
So now that BC is out, I'm being tempted again. I've resolved not to give in. (Okay, well at least not until after I finish a few other games on my list).
So I went to the comic store today to pick up a few things. I had an urge to splurge. I wanted to spoil myself with something new and fun and exciting. Sandman volume 5 was all sold out, to my dismay. I was really looking forward to reading that.
Instead, I bought 2 of these.
It's not quite the same as the online version, but I figured it would be a little more social, possibly more entertaining, and not nearly as costly as that $20/month subscription fee.
Clever Blizzard. They've designed it in just such a way that, like any other CCG I've ever played, you basically have to buy more cards. The game requires a 60 card deck. The clever bastards give you a 30 card starter and two 15 card boosters, which means that right from the get-go you don't even have a full 60 card deck, since you won't be able to use the majority of the booster contents in your 30 card preconstructed deck. Nevermind the fact that the hero classes in the pre-con. decks aren't labelled on the box, so there's now way of knowing what kind of deck you're purchasing until it's too late. What if I don't wanna play a Night-Elf Druid, huh? What about that?
Maybe I should just reactivate my WoW account and log back in... *sigh*
( In all honestly though, I'm really looking forward to trying this game out. It's been a while since I've played a good CCG. I kinda miss them. Just a little. )
1.15.2007
|:: Channel Open ::: Begin Transmission ::|
Grayscale, my former "blog", is being abandoned. As much as I liked having a custom-designed site, it just didn't have all the functionality I would have liked. It was a neat experiment for me, but I just don't have the technical know-how to improve upon that page and make it do everything I want.
So instead, I've made myself a page on blogger. I feel like I'm cheating myself somehow. At least now I'll be able to post neat things like links, images, and multi-colored text. And should anybody care to respond to whatever I've written, now they'll have the means.
So instead, I've made myself a page on blogger. I feel like I'm cheating myself somehow. At least now I'll be able to post neat things like links, images, and multi-colored text. And should anybody care to respond to whatever I've written, now they'll have the means.
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